


The Makings of a Herald

by IntriguingScenes



Series: A Slice of Heaven in the Middle of Hell [1]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Beginnings, Gen, Prelude to Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2015-08-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 16:20:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3616308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IntriguingScenes/pseuds/IntriguingScenes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From a member of the Chantry to Herald of Andraste within a few days is a huge leap for Cara Trevelyan. She suddenly finds herself as the face of the Inquisition, a position she is completely unprepared for.<br/>Series of one-shots from around Haven following the Herald of Andraste as she stumbles through the early days of the Inquisition.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've been thinking about doing some stuff in Haven and this is the first story I've come up with. Not sure where it might go from here, but one step at a time! :) The idea here is that this is right as the Inquisition begins. I kind of imagined that my Inquisitor (human dual-wielding rogue named Cara if your a first time reader) would adjust to circumstances easily, but needed a bit of a kickstart, provided here by Cassandra. Hope you enjoy it!

Maker’s breath!  What had she been thinking?  What had she gotten herself into?  Cara Trevelyan, youngest daughter of a noble family in the Free Marcher city of Ostwick, was now being called the Herald of Andraste and proclaimed a heretic by the Chantry she thought she would spend her life serving!  As if that wasn’t bad enough, she was poised to help lead a group of other heretics in an effort to restore peace to Thedas!  Maker, what had she done?

Taking a calming breath, Cara walked out of the council’s meeting room and into the main hall of the Chantry.  She hadn’t realized when Cassandra and Leliana had asked her to help them that they had meant in such an active fashion. She hadn’t even thought of it at the time; she just agreed without consideration.  It had only been one day since then and this had been their first meeting with the advisors, but Cara was struggling not to panic.  After thinking on it, she had suspected that she would be kept under lock and key, only brought out to use her mark when it was needed. Now here they all were telling her that she was seen as some kind of Herald and would be spreading word of the Inquisition herself! 

Walking down the hall, Cara suddenly veered right through a door that led to the dungeon below.  She remembered walking out of this door with Cassandra when this mess had started and being so confused she didn’t know where to begin.  Now here she was, right back where she had started, and no closer to understanding than she had been.  Well, maybe a few of her questions had been answered, but more had sprung up almost immediately.  She didn’t know why she came down here, but she needed a chance to think and somehow this seemed appropriate, not to mention it was secluded.

She stood in the middle of the room where she had woken up three days prior and sighed heavily.  Leaning back against one of the poles, she slid down to the floor, trying to ignore the awkward daggers she held on her back.  All she could keep thinking was “why me” and “what am I supposed to do now”.  Cara had no idea how long she had been sitting there when she heard footsteps on the stairs down the hall.  She thought about greeting them, then about hiding, but she didn’t move either way.  The steps grew closer, clearly heading her way rather than going to the small library this Chantry inexplicably had in their dungeon.  Cara still didn’t look up.

“Herald?”  Cassandra’s Nevarran accent was unmistakable.  “What are you doing down here?”  Cara didn’t answer at first.  When she did, she didn’t look up from her study of the center of the floor, the little spot that had been her own prison for a few days.

“Honestly?  I’m trying to figure out how I got here.  I’m a nobody from Ostwick who had joined the Chantry and was apparently in the wrong place at the wrong time so people deem me a divine figure’s herald.”  Showing more sympathy than Cara expected, Cassandra slid down the post opposite her looking like she was trying to comfort the Herald.

“Leliana checked into your background.  I don’t think a Trevelyan can be considered a nobody from Ostwick.”

“I may have a noble name, but that’s about it.  I was promised to the Chantry as a child,” Cara said bitterly.  She suddenly realized she was being unkind to this woman who had shown faith in her when there had been little reason to and looked up at her.  “I’m sorry.  Everything is just moving so fast and I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“You did agree to help us,” Cassandra reminded her.

“I know.  And I’ll stand by that, I swear.  But I guess I didn’t realize I would be such a prominent figure in the Inquisition.  I half expected you all to lock me up until my mark was needed.  And people calling me the “Herald of Andraste”?  I don’t even remember what happened.  How can they take such a huge leap?”

“You still don’t remember?”  Cara shook her head.  “Besides what you told Leliana and I, what is the last thing you can remember?”  Cara fixed her gaze on the stone wall behind Cassandra trying to call up any memories she may still have.

“I remember arriving at the Convlave, but to be honest, everything after that is a blur.  Like jumbled pieces of a story you weren’t really paying attention to in the first place.  The last thing I remember is walking up a flight of stairs, but I don’t remember where I was going or what I was doing.  If what we heard in the Temple of Sacred Ashes was true, I apparently was walking to or near the Divine’s room.”  She had a feeling what they had heard was true, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to believe it.

“That must be difficult, to remember so little.”

“It is.  I keep thinking that if I concentrate hard enough I’ll remember, but I can’t seem to even find anything to concentrate on.  It almost feels like erasing writing on paper.  And now I’m swept up in events that I feel woefully unprepared for.  I was supposed to go to the Chantry!  Maker’s breath, I’m not a fighter or a leader or anything else.  I can’t help but think that if Andraste did pick me, she chose poorly.  Or the people did, one.”  Cara resumed her study of the floor beside her.

“Feel better?”  Cara couldn’t help but smile a little bit.

“Actually, yes, I do.”  She looked back up to her companion.  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to go on like that.  We barely know each other…”

“It’s alright, Herald.  I hadn’t considered the impact this must be having on you.  For what it’s worth, though, I don’t know if Andraste saved you or not.  All I know right now is that you tried to help the Divine, if the voices in the temple were real, and you have helped us all, even at great risk to your life.  You may not be a trained fighter or leader, but you have survived two incidents in the last few days that should have killed you.  Yet here you are.”  Cassandra stood, preparing to leave.  “To me that says someone has been watching over you, for whatever reason.  So I suppose that just leaves one question that needs answered before anything else: what are you going to do about it, Herald?”  The Seeker turned down the hallway, leaving the question hanging in the air for Cara.  Before she left, though, Cara stood.

“Seeker Pentaghast!” she called.  Cassandra turned around.  “Thank you.  And please, call me Cara.”  She smiled, hoping it would ease some of the tension of their conversation.  Cassandra smiled back at her, nodding in acceptance.

“And you may call me Cassandra.”  With that she walked down the hall and disappeared into the stairwell. 

Cara remained in the dungeon for a while after Cassandra left.  The Seeker’s words kept ringing in her ears.  While standing there in the center of the room, Cara came to a couple realizations.  First, she had survived the impossible twice now and she had the only means of closing a hole in the sky, insane though that sounded.  Perhaps that really _did_ mean that someone was watching out for her.  And if that was true, maybe she was here for a reason.  And with that, she no longer minded being called the Herald of Andraste.  Her second realization was that she definitely was unprepared for what lay before her.  But she also wasn’t alone.  Some things others could do, but she was going to have to learn how to fight.  She had managed with some rudimentary skills, but that wouldn’t get her very far.  And she was certain there were other things people here in Haven could teach her.  With a sudden blush, she realized she would also need to learn to ride a horse, having never had the need at home. 

She stood taller than she ever remembered when turning to leave the dungeon, walking with her head high in a way she had never dared at home.  Mother Giselle would have to wait a few more days, but Cara had decided exactly what she was going to do about her situation.  She wouldn’t doubt herself, she would learn what she had to, and she would do what would need to be done.  If someone had to spread word of a group trying to stand against chaos, it might as well be her!

* * *

 

Cassandra, of course, had had her own concerns since declaring the Inquisition reborn, but she ignored them for the moment.  She had found Cara in the dungeon, of all places, and their talk had been enlightening.  In her own doubts, she had never considered that Cara would be completely out of place and unsure in all of this.  Perhaps she would voice her own concerns to the Herald later.  She feared she had been too hard on this newcomer, but she recognized a soldier that needed a spark when she saw one.  Cara may not be a soldier yet, but she would have to become one.

Returning to the camps outside the gates of Haven, Cassandra pushed her conversation with Cara and her own concerns out of her mind as she chose a practice dummy and drew her sword.  Some time later, though she had lost track of time and didn’t know how long she had been beating the dummy with her weapon, she saw Cara emerge from Haven’s gate.  The woman looked different.  It was subtle, but there was a determination there that nearly made her eyes shine like green fire that hadn’t been there before.  Cara didn’t say anything, but found a dummy lying on the ground, picked it up, and walked away with it over a hill.  Curious, Cassandra sheathed her sword and followed her. 

She found her a distance away where she was unlikely to be noticed.  Her dummy was set up and she was drawing her daggers.  About that time Cassandra heard footsteps behind her, quietly approaching her hiding spot.  She turned to find Commander Cullen behind her, quizzical look on his face.  Cassandra motioned for him to be quiet and approach low, which he did, taking a position beside the Seeker to watch the Herald. 

Cara had been testing the weight of her daggers and the balance of them in her hands, in addition to the strength of her dummy.  She poked the target several times gently, circling it like an inspection.  She was diligent, Cassandra noted silently.  Diligent and methodical.  This woman was no mage, but she almost reminded Cassandra of some of the more research-oriented mages she had known.  Glancing to the side she saw Cullen watching the woman with equal parts of confusion and interest.  Cara then completed her examination and, seeming satisfied, started swinging her daggers more forcefully against the target.  She clearly hadn’t been exaggerating when she said she was no fighter, but at least she was trying. 

The Herald began hitting the target harder and harder, her knuckles growing white around the hilts of her daggers.  She started trying different ways to strike, rather than just the poking motion she had been doing.  Then she started moving around the dummy, striking from different sides.  When Cassandra could see her face, she looked almost angry like that one target was responsible for every bad thing in the world.

“Blighted mages,” Cara said as she circled and attacked her foe.  “Blighted Templars.”  Another attack.  “Blighted Conclave!”  She hit harder every time she named a new problem.  “I’m no leader.  I’m no fighter.  So what do I do?  Find myself a niche in the one place I need everything I was never prepared for.”  It wasn’t pity or sorrow Cassandra heard in her voice, though it easily could have been.  Beside her, Cullen watched the display with awe. 

“Fine,” Cara continued, “I’m the Herald of bloody Andraste!  I’m a…a… _fucking_ heretic!”  The way she spat the word into the air, Cassandra had the sudden notion that Cara had never cursed like that before. “ _I’m_ the face of the only group of people with any sense still in their heads!  I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know why this is happening, but damn it, someone has got to set the world right!”  Her attacks and movements had rapidly sped up as she spoke and, surprisingly, became more useful, like her words were distracting her so she could act.  “The Inquisition and its Herald will work if it’s the last thing I do!”  With her last word, she turned one final time and made a clean slice through the dummy’s neck as if to emphasize her point.

Cara stood there panting for a moment, then slowly seemed to realize what she had done to the dummy.  Every soldier remembered two things their entire career.  One was, of course, the first time they killed a man.  Second, however, is the first realization that if their practice dummy were a person, they would have killed him.  Cassandra just witnessed their Herald’s first of those two memories.  Cara stood in shock for a moment, then sighed.

“I just pray Andraste chose wisely,” Cara said before returning to her dummy.  She made sure the head was solid before she made a move to strike again.  She stopped before striking, though, and cocked her head to one side, studying her inanimate opponent.  The Herald stepped away, returning her daggers to their sheaths, looking at the branches on a nearby tree.  She tugged on a branch and it came away with a crack.  Cassandra was utterly confused as to what the young woman thought she was going to do with a stick when she already had her weapons and a practice dummy.  She looked to Cullen, who unhelpfully just shrugged his shoulders.

Returning to the dummy, Cara looked down the length of her branch, pulled out a dagger and trimmed it a bit.  Then she picked up one of the discarded pieces and tied it across one end of the shortened branch with a piece of string she produced from a pocket.  After a little trial and error, and some more string, Cassandra realized Cara was setting up makeshift sword so that she would have something to maneuver around.  _Methodical, determined_ and _clever_ , Cassandra thought.  _Perhaps this will turn out for the best._

Cassandra decided to leave the Herald in peace after that, motioning for Cullen to follow.  He took one last look at Cara with a great deal of respect in his gaze before following the Seeker back to camp.  Cassandra briefly considered telling the Commander about her conversation with Cara, which she was pretty sure had prompted what they had just witnessed, but decided that it wasn’t necessary.  Cara had practically told them everything without ever meaning to.

“That woman has the makings of a great leader,” Cullen observed when they were far enough away.  “It’s rare to find a combination of determination and adaptability like that.  And they almost always make extraordinary leaders.”

“It will be interesting to see what she does with it,” Cassandra said.  “We all had our doubts when we found her, but Cara Trevelyan just might save the world.”


	2. The Herald and her Books

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one doesn't have a summary because I couldn't think of a way to describe the chapter without it sounding ridiculously boring.  
> Anyway, this is one of those cute little things I just imagined Cara doing at some point. Some is from Cara's POV and some is from Cullen's. Feedback is always appreciated and I hope you like it!

            Cara loved books.  It didn’t really matter what kind, for the most part.  So long as it had an interesting plot or an interesting argument to be made, she was hooked.  For some reason she had never been able to fathom, the Haven Chantry had a library behind a locked gate in its dungeon.  Fortunately for Cara, Varric was teaching her to pick locks.  She had been ecstatic the day she had finally made it into this treasure trove.  She suspected it would be mostly books on the Chantry, but she was desperate for something to read.  It was difficult to choose just one to start with, until her eye landed on a book beside one of the shelves.  It was carefully tucked into a corner where most people would miss it.  Picking up the book, she recognized Varric’s _Tale of the Champion_.  She had never gotten to read this one, though she did enjoy his mystery tales.  With that, she sat down and began reading.  Barely half an hour had passed before she found herself thoroughly uncomfortable in the dungeon’s lighting, and the hard seat beneath her wasn’t helping either.

            Walking out of the dungeon and up the stairs, she continued reading.  She had to walk slowly, but she wanted to maximize the little bit of time she had for pleasure-reading.  Outside the Chantry was the usual buzz of activity and chatter, but she ignored it, walking in the direction of the tavern to find a snack.  It didn’t take her long to pilfer a bright green apple and continue down the path.  It was a pleasant day, if a bit cool, so she opted to stay outside, though she wasn’t sure where she would go.  It occurred to her that the dock on the frozen lake was usually empty, so she turned towards the gate to Haven.  Most people were attending to other duties this time of day, so she didn’t have to navigate around many people.  Even better, no one was trying to get her attention for anything.

            Because there were so few people in the immediate area, she was completely stunned when she stepped towards the gate, only to find herself flat on her back on the ground.  She blinked up at the sky, unsure of what happened or where her book was, though she had been able to keep a hold of her apple. 

            “Herald!  I’m so sorry!” she heard from in front of her and sat up.  Apparently she had run straight into Commander Cullen.  Cara looked up at him trying to think of what to say through her embarrassment.  Cullen knelt in front of her looking concerned when she didn’t say anything.  “Are you alright?”  Cara’s senses finally returned to her and she smiled.

            “I’m fine, Commander.  I wasn’t watching where I was walking.”  Cullen helped her up, then bent down to pick her book up.

            “Do you make a habit of walking through villages with your nose buried in a book?”

            “More than you’d think, though it was usually my family’s manor rather than a village.”  Cullen looked down at the book he still had in his hands.

            “ _Tale of the_ …”  He gave her a very pointed look.  “You do know most of this is highly exaggerated, right?”

            “Is it now?”

            “Varric tends to exaggerate, yes.  And Hawke was little better.”

            “Wait, you knew them?”  She knew he had been recruited to the Inquisition in Kirkwall, but somehow she hadn’t really made the connection.  Suddenly she didn’t know whether to ask him about the truth or feel sorry for him that he was there.

            “Not well, but yes.  It was more of a passing knowledge.  Hawke’s skill with her greatsword caused quite a bit of talk among the Templars.”  Something in his eyes prevented her from asking any further questions.

            “Well, even if it isn’t true, it’s still an entertaining book.  I’ll just pretend it’s completely fiction.”  She smiled at him, hoping to replace the slight tension she felt with levity.  It partially worked; he smirked when he handed the book back to her.

            “Just remember that for future reference.  And you might want to wait until you get where you’re going to start reading again.”  Cara flushed.

            “I am sorry about that.” 

            “Are you sure you aren’t hurt?”

            “Only my dignity, Commander, I promise you.”  With one last sincere smile, she stepped around him and walked down the stairs outside Haven.  She opened the book again at the bottom of the stairs.  With her back to Cullen, she didn’t see the small smile and shake of the commander’s head at her act of defiance.

 

* * *

 

            Several days after knocking the Herald to the ground by the front gate, Cullen found himself walking through the village to Cara’s quarters with a book in his hand.  He had walked through the gate just in time to slam into the Herald, knocking her backwards into the dirt.  Granted, if she hadn’t been reading, it probably wouldn’t have happened, but he still felt guilty and slightly embarrassed for his part in it.  When she walked away and immediately opened her book again, he couldn’t help but smile, knowing there was a decent chance she would run into someone or something else.  Arriving at her quarters, Cullen knocked on her door.

            “Come in!” he heard her answer.

            “Herald?” he said as he stepped through the door, closing it behind him.

            “Come on in, Commander.  I won’t bite.”  He could hear the smile in her tone.  Entering the main room, he looked around for her, then stopped in his tracks.  She was standing in front of a basin of water washing her hair.  Her shirt was thin enough to see through and the sleeves were rolled up to her elbows.  It also appeared as though it may have been open in the front.  Thankfully she was facing away from him. 

            “Oh!  I’m sorry, Herald.  I’ll come back later,” he said, turning on his heel to exit.

            “Nonsense!  I’m nearly finished, if you don’t mind waiting a few minutes.  Or we can talk while I finish.  I’m impartial.”  He could hear her smile again.  “There’s a chair beside you if you want to sit down.”  Cullen remained standing while Cara bent over the basin to rinse her hair.  He tried to look anywhere but in her direction.  It wasn’t as if she was completely undressed, but this was a very informal way to greet someone you barely knew.  It felt like a very awkward hour before she turned her attention to him, even though he knew it had only been a few minutes.

            “Now, what did you need, Commander?”  She suddenly stood before him buttoning a jacket with a towel over her shoulder, presumably for her hair.  When he didn’t completely look at her, she leaned a little closer to his line of vision, grinning.  “It’s safe to look, I promise.” Her grin said she noticed how uncomfortable he felt.  With a small shake of his head, he remembered why he was here to begin with.

            “Right.  I was thinking about that…incident at the gate a few days ago.”  It was her turn to flush, though she tried to cover it by drying her hair.  “It may not be as entertaining as one of Varric’s tales, but I brought you something.” She took the book from his offering hand with a smile.

            “You brought me a book?”  She looked like he had just given her a diamond.

            “Don’t get too excited.  It’s a little dry.  It’s more of a manual, I suppose, on tactics.  I thought you might be able to use the help since you’re still new to all this.” Surprisingly, her expression didn’t waiver, even when she looked up. 

            “Where did you get this?  I thought I had seen every book in Haven.”

            “It’s mine, actually.  I brought it with me from Kirkwall.  Dry though it may be, it is useful.”  She hugged it to her chest, still smiling brightly.

            “That’s so thoughtful!  I can’t wait to start.  I studied history before going to the Chantry, but battles and tactics weren’t exactly encouraged.  It never occurred to me to look for a book on the subject!”

            “Do you get this excited over every book you run across?”

            “Not _every_ book.  Just most of them.  Don’t you like to read?”

            “Not quite as much as you, I would wager, but it is enjoyable on those rare occasions I have the opportunity.”

            “You should make more time.”  She pursed her lips in thought, then walked over to a shelf to skim over a few books.  “Here.  Try this one.  It’s not exactly a true story, but I think it’s based on Ser Aveline. Next time you get the opportunity, you’ll have something more than requisitions and reports to read.” 

            “I don’t know when that would be, Herald.”  Not taking no for an answer, Cara raised an eyebrow, took his hand, and closed it around the spine of the book, pressing it to his chest. 

            “Don’t worry about it.  I’m sure you’ll have the chance eventually.  And if you never do, that’s alright too.  Everyone should have a distraction now and then, you included.”  Her expression was soft, but firm enough that he knew he couldn’t give the book back to her.

            “I…Thank you, Herald.”  She seemed very pleased that he accepted her offering. “I should go.  I just wanted to give you that.  Have a good evening.”

            “You too, Commander. And thank you again.”  Cullen turned to go, glancing back at Cara before latching the door closed.  She was standing in the middle of the room with his book, looking through its pages with reverence.  He smiled to himself as he returned to his own quarters with the book he hadn’t expected to receive.  The Herald’s obsession with books was actually rather endearing, he found, and he made a mental note of that preference for the future.


	3. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara reaches the limits of what she can figure out herself when it comes to her daggers. Luckily, she gets a little help from the Commander.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to do a little bit of editing on this one. I went back to read what I had so far in this series and realized my continuity didn't always line up. Woops!!

Haven was a small place and the as the Inquisition grew, it became harder and harder for Cara to find secluded places to practice her fighting, riding, or even just to hear herself think. Iron Bull had caught her one night sitting on the edge of the bridge leading to the ruins of the Temple of Sacred Ashes. She had been sitting peacefully, leaning against the wall behind her and looking up at the Breach.

"Don't jump, Boss," he said from beside her, his tone indicating he knew she wasn't considering it.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Bull," she had replied. "Besides, with my luck I'd probably just land on my feet and saunter away. Or open another Breach or something. My luck is a little weird like that." They laughed.

"So what are you doing up here?"

"Promise you won't tell?" Iron Bull nodded and she motioned to the Breach. "I know we're supposed to be terrified of it, and I am, but if you can ignore that, it's kind of pretty." He had looked at her with an odd expression, but they talked a while long before walking back down the hill.

Today, however, she suspected there would be little levity from anyone. Cara was in a foul mood trying to find a place away from everyone to practice her dagger work. She finally found a place and began working around the practice dummy she had set up. She was infinitely better at fighting than she had originally been, but it was still frustrating at times. A dummy offered few variations on what she already knew how to do. She would love to train with someone, but the people she would trust to help her had their own tasks that needed attention. Cara had always thought she was pretty intelligent, though, so she found other ways, like using a stick as a sword for her dummy and repairing a discarded shield well enough for her purposes. Many times she watched the soldiers train or Commander Cullen, or Cassandra to get a better idea of how these implements were used. In the field, she would observe before striking, often having Solas deal with other mages while she focused on more physical attacks. Cara had had little contact with mages in Ostwick, making her uncomfortable around them. She was actually planning on approaching the Templars as a result, but Solas was a credit to the field and she quickly became more comfortable with him than she would have anticipated.

Cara moved around her inanimate target, dodged imaginary attacks, even threw one of the "stealth bombs," as she called them, that Varric had taught her to make. No matter what she did, however, it continued to feel like the same thing she had done the day before and for the past three days before that. Practice made perfect, she knew, and repetition was part of that, but she also knew that she needed to find new strategies and movements. It was becoming increasingly annoying that she couldn't seem to figure out the nuances herself. Returning to her starting point yet again, she stopped, groaned, then turned and threw one of her daggers at the target. Much to her surprise, it connected with a dull "thunk!" in the center of the dummy and stayed there.

"With aim like that, perhaps you should take up the bow." Cara whirled at the unexpected voice, slightly raising her other dagger even though she knew there was no cause for that. She found Cullen leaning against a tree behind her grinning. He motioned to the dagger in the dummy's chest.

"That's actually a rather impressive throw. Not everyone can make it stick without looking." Cara laughed a little and relaxed her hand on her dagger.

"I'm not sure I could do it again if I had to. Pretty sure that was just luck."

"Still impressive, even if it was a one-time event."

"Can you throw a dagger?" She hadn't meant to ask that, and now that it was out of her mouth, she was terrified he would take offense. "I, uh, I only ask out of curiosity, not to, that is…" She stopped stammering an ill-begotten apology and bit down on her lips when she him smirk.

He didn't answer, though. Instead, he retrieved her dagger from the dummy and handed it to her; she then sheathed her weapons. His smirk never left, she noticed. Producing a dagger from somewhere, he turned on his heel and threw it at the target, barely even having time to register where it was, let alone aim for it. Cullen's dagger landed solidly in the middle of the dummy's head.

"Wow," Cara breathed as Cullen pulled the dagger out and returned it to its hiding place. She just looked at him with wide eyes when he turned around again.

"I taught myself to throw daggers during Templar training. I always thought it best to have a ranged back-up weapon without carrying a bow." He chuckled a little. "Not to mention I'm dreadful with a bow." She returned his smile.

"I've never shot one, myself, but I don't think I have an aptitude for it either."

"Not everyone does, and I have great respect for those who do." Cara nodded in agreement, instantly thinking of Varric. The conversation fell to silence for a moment, just long enough to border on awkward.

"Might I ask you a question, Herald?"

"Of course."

"Why do you come all the way out here to practice alone? Wouldn't you be better served at least training with someone who fights back?"

"Maybe I just want to perpetuate the Herald of Andraste's enigma," she said, grinning devilishly.

"Enigma," Cullen said flatly, though he was smirking.

"Of course! You know, the mysterious Marcher who survived the Conclave and is now the symbol of peace around Thedas?" Cara started exaggerating her gestures for effect. "' _But wait_ ,' they'll say, ' _has anyone ever actually seen her practice with those daggers?_ ' And the answer is no. ' _Then how does she fight chaos_ ' someone will question and another will offer that ' _she is just good_.' Or maybe they will think my daggers are for show, until I use them in their sight. Consider it: no one will ever know what to make of me! It's the perfect plan to keep people on their toes!" She smiled at Cullen and was thrilled to hear him laugh at her ridiculous joke.

"You have it all planned out, then?" he laughed.

"It's fool-proof, I tell you!" She faked shock, turning her expression more concerned. "Oh no! I've told you, though! Now you'll never believe in my enigma!"

"Your secret is safe with me, my lady." Cullen proceeded to mock a bow in her direction, laughing with her the whole time.

"Do you always deflect questions you don't want to answer with humor?" he questioned when they stopped laughing.

"Actually, that's a recent development. I think I've been spending too much time around Varric."

"As much as I enjoyed hearing your master plan, care to give me a straight answer?" Cara sighed and crossed her arms, looking towards Haven.

"I'm not a fighter, Commander, as you may have noticed. I'm an ex-Chantry sister who was probably in the wrong place at the wrong time. Now I'm the Herald of Andraste, bringing peace with a dagger. But I don't know what I'm doing. I come out here so people don't know that. I suspect it's better for soldiers and allies not to see their Herald flailing at a target, real or not, with daggers she barely knows how to use."

"And you're alone because…"

"Everyone has their own duties to attend to. I'm reasonably intelligent; I should be able to figure it out without pulling people away from where they're needed."

"So you dive into the unknown with rudimentary skills and little real practice because you don't want to ask for help?" Cara's eyes darted to him in surprise.

"When you say it like that it sounds horrible. It's not like it's pride or something and I am careful in the field. And I do ask for help on other things. Varric has taught me quite a bit. And I observe the way weapons are used by soldiers. But this takes more time and commitment. I don't want to be the cause of someone missing something important just to teach me to use my daggers." Cara wrinkled her nose at him. "I'm not making this sound any better, am I?" Cullen smirked a little and walked around behind her.

"Not really, no. Consider it this way: you need more experience before you encounter something you can't handle. Without it, the Inquisition loses the one advantage we have against the Breach." He had circled around her and now stood squarely in front of her, closer than he had been. "And those of us who know you personally would lose someone we are all quickly beginning to call a friend." She had to admit that she had never thought of it quite like that.

"For what it's worth, I'm extraordinarily careful in the field. But I accept your argument, Commander. Do you have anyone you trust in mind that could help me?" He considered the question carefully.

"I believe there is only one person I would entrust that task to." He took a few steps away, drew his sword, and faced her. "Myself." Cara was stunned he would offer such a personal thing.

"Oh, no, Commander. I couldn't take your time like that. You have an army to train!"

"And a Herald to keep alive. Besides, I would enjoy the practice of fighting someone with a different style. I rarely get the opportunity." Cara thought about it. At least she wouldn't have to get used to someone new, and he was quite skilled.

"Are you certain I won't detract from your other duties?"

"I'm positive. This is mutually beneficial and my other duties will be just fine."

"Well then, I suppose I could use the help." She drew her daggers and smiled, suddenly very excited about the prospect. "But only under two conditions. One, don't hesitate to tell me if you can't do this on any given day. I won't have this interfering with Inquisition forces."

"Sounds fair. And the second?"

"Call me Cara, at least in private. It'll be easier than a title."

"So long as you use my given names as well, you have a deal. Cara." She hadn't realized until he said her name that she had sorely missed hearing it. Few called her by name anymore, though she was trying to remedy that.

"Good. Cullen."

Cara noted over the next week that her skills improved more than they had in the last month. Having a partner helped more than she had expected, and his immense skill and knowledge gave her tips she never would have figured out herself. Now if she could just master riding a horse… It wasn't long before she started thinking of asking him for help on that, too.


	4. Observations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't help but image Cara talking to herself. A lot. And of course she has to get caught in the act. :) I also kind of headcanon that Cara observes a lot of things, so there's some of that here, too. This is set after meeting with the Chantry in Val Royeaux. Enjoy!

            Snow crunched beneath Cullen’s boots as he slowly walked through Haven.  It was quite late, so few people were out.  The light from the Breach lit up the path like a full moon.  He did enjoy being able to take a walk so late without having to carry a lantern, even if the light he had was coming from something rather sinister.  It wasn’t unusual for him to be out so late, being restless and unable to sleep, so the guards no longer paid attention when their Commander roamed the village.  Eventually Cullen found himself in the Chantry heading to the room they had been using for council meetings.  If he couldn’t sleep, he might as well get some work done.  To his surprise, the door was ajar and light was shining through.  As he approached, wondering who could possibly be here at this hour, he heard someone speaking.

            “What are they doing?  Why would they withdraw from the world like this?”  It was the Herald.  Cullen quietly approached the door to find her standing in her usual place at the table leaning over the map.  He didn’t even know she had returned from Val Royeaux.  “I get them being hesitant about me, but why attack a mother?  Cassandra said the Lord Seeker shouldn’t even be in charge of the Templars.”  So that’s what this was about.  He had seen her message from meeting with the Chantry in Val Royeaux; it hadn’t gone well.  Cara groaned.  “I won’t figure it out just by looking at a map.  So what else is going on?  No, that one doesn’t go there; other pile.  How many piles of reports do we need?”  With a start, Cullen realized there was no one else in the room.  He couldn’t help but smile.  So, the Herald thought out loud when alone.  Cullen pushed the door open, trying to make a bit of noise so as not to scare Cara.  It didn’t work.  Cara turned while reading a report and jumped when she caught sight of him. The paper in her hand fell to the floor as she pressed her hand to her chest audibly.

            “Commander!” she gasped.  Then she smiled and closed her eyes.  “You startled me.  I wasn’t expecting anyone to be up so late.”  Cullen knelt to retrieve the paper she had been reading.

            “Likewise.  I’m sorry I snuck up on you.  I didn’t even know you had returned from your trip.”  Cara took the paper from his outstretched hand.  At least she was breathing normally again and she had dropped the hand from her chest.

            “It’s alright.  We got back a few hours ago.  If I had been thinking, I would have stood on the other side of the table.  There’s a light you can see through a crack in the door, so I would have seen you coming.”

            “That’s…very observant of you,” Cullen replied, thoroughly impressed.  He thought he had been the only one to notice that.  In fact, it’s why he preferred to stand where he did when in council meetings, so he wouldn’t be surprised by someone entering the room.  Cara shrugged at his compliment.

            “It’s a gift.  I sometimes notice a lot of things most people don’t.  It’s not always helpful, but I find it interesting.”  Cullen stepped over to the table beside where she was leaning.  After brief consideration, he leaned against the table beside her.  It was solid enough for them both.

            “Enlighten me, then.  What have you noticed around Haven?”  Cara pursed her lips in thought for a moment before turning enough to pour two cups of tea from a pot he hadn’t seen.  Why she had two cups, he had no idea.  Taking the cup she offered, he got a strong whiff of mint.

            “Let’s see…  Leliana won’t tell me much, but I think she plays a stringed instrument.  She has callouses on her fingers that don’t look like they come from a bow.  Cassandra likes to read, but she doesn’t want anyone to know for some reason because she only brings her book out when she thinks no one is around.  And she’s very careful about where she packs her book for a trip, and who handles that bag.  Varric likes flowers, but they don’t always like him.  I’ve seen him pick flowers before, but he always avoids embrium in particular.  He won’t even go near the bag I stow what I’ve gathered in.  I don’t know what to make of Solas.  I like him and his stories are amazing, but I’m pretty sure that’s a wolf’s jawbone he wears, and that’s a little disconcerting.  Better than human or something, but still.  I don’t have anything on Josephine; she’s too accustomed to the Game to let things slip easily.”  Cara fell silent, sipping her tea.  He suspected there was more she had noticed, but it was an interesting demonstration.  He also wasn’t sure he wanted to know what she might know about him.  Cara shifted nervously beside him.  “And peppermint might help some of your headaches,” she half mumbled into her teacup.  He shot a look at her; that revelation had surprised him.

            “How did you know about my headaches?”  Surely someone had told her that piece of information.  Cara’s face reddened and she looked like she was trying make herself smaller.

            “I didn’t for sure; I just thought that the most likely thing.  Some days you seem a little stiff like you’re trying not to move too much.  And you squint more.  You’re more quiet than usual, too.  It looked like a migraine to me.”  Cara started chewing on her lip.  “I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have said anything.”  She started to leave, but he caught her shoulder, stopping her.

            “Don’t apologize.  It’s good advice.  I was only surprised you had noticed.  I try not to let it show.”  She looked at him sheepishly and grinned, still chewing her lip a bit.  Clearing her throat, she ran a hand through her hair and walked around the table.  Cullen turned to face her.

            “Now if I could just figure out what the Templars are doing that easily…”  She leaned her elbows on the table, leaving her teacup beside her and resting her cheek on one hand.  “I don’t suppose you have any idea, do you?”

            “I’m afraid not.  I’m just as baffled as you are.”

            “Probably more, since you were one of them.”

            “Perhaps.  Their actions make little sense. Did they really punch one of the mothers?”  Cara nodded somberly.

            “I suppose in fairness, I’m not certain that was an _actual_ Templar.  He looked more like a thug they hired to me.  But that’s semantics in my book.”

            “Agreed.  You know we’ll figure this out, right?  We’ll find them.”

            “Oh, I know.  It’s just so annoying!”  She started pouting at the table, which made Cullen smirk.  It was almost…cute.  “Can’t anything ever be simple?”  Cullen opened his mouth to answer, but she held up a hand.  “That was a rhetorical question.  Clearly the answer is a resounding no.”  That made him chuckle.

            “Where would the excitement in life be if everything were simple?”  The question earned him a look, then a breathy laugh and a smile.  She stood up, crossing her arms and shifting her weight to one leg, a favored stance, he had noticed.

            “I suppose.  But it would be nice if something was simple every once in a while.”

            “We’ll just have to find simplicity where we can, then.”  Cara nodded in agreement.

            “Simplicity in friends and a cup of tea, then?” she smiled with her head cocked inquisitively.  Had they already become friends? He supposed they had after all the trainings and random conversations they had had over the last few weeks.  He had to admit, he liked the idea of being able to consider her a friend.

            “Works for me,” he said returning her smile.


	5. Revisiting the Hinterlands

            Cara was starting to develop a love-hate relationship with all the travelling she was doing with the Inquisition.  On one hand, she loved seeing all the places around Thedas that she had never thought she would see.  On the other hand, though, she felt like she was constantly on the run with something requiring her immediate attention.  She still sometimes marveled that she was given so much freedom within the Inquisition.  When she had agreed to help, she hadn’t realized that she would pretty much be making decisions on her own.  It was their faith in her that stunned her.  And she loved that trust, even if she didn’t always like making the decisions.  They had trusted her to go to Val Royeaux to meet with the Chantry; Cassandra had at least been there for that.  Cara suspected that was more for protection than for oversight, though.  No one blinked an eye when she allowed Sera, an elven archer and “Red Jenny” (whatever that was supposed to mean), to join.  They had looked in awe when she brought Vivienne back with her; recruiting the Orlesian empress’ court mage should have been impossible.  Now Cara, Cassandra, Solas, and Sera were on their way to find a Grey Warden, who they hoped could explain a few things, and a mercenary band that wanted to help.  This was definitely going to be a very long trip since one of their targets was in southern Fereldan and the other was on the Storm Coast, but it needed done and there was no sense in making multiple trips out.

            Val Royeaux had been far from encouraging, so it was nice to be doing something beneficial again.  If their meeting with the Chantry had shown Cara nothing else, it definitively proved the Chantry would not be helping the people who needed it, and the Templars may very well make matters even worse.  So the Inquisition swept into the Hinterlands yet again to further help the people seemingly abandoned by those who should be doing something.  It had been a small hope, yet Cara had held onto it that they wouldn’t have to attack the mage and Templar strongholds in the area.  She had heard of them when they were first here, but that seemed like a very drastic measure at the time.  Now, she saw no other recourse. It was slow work, but Cara and her party moved through the Hinterlands removing the last remnants of the mage-Templar conflict.  Clearing the mages in their cave had made that part of the road much safer for those at the Crossroads and the village of Redcliffe.  They only had the Templars left, which they took care of rather easily despite the number and heavy armor.  After clearing out the host of Templars, Cara plopped down on a rock to clean her daggers while Sera retrieved arrows and Cassandra cleaned her sword and shield.  Solas was searching some of the bodies around the compound.

            “I know we just killed people, but does anyone else feel like a parent that just told two siblings ‘you’re done fighting, now’?”  Cassandra paused in cleaning her sword.  Sera laughed.

            “Right?  It’s like ‘I don’t care who started it I’m ending it,’ innit?”  That was possibly the most coherent sentence Cara had heard from the elf’s mouth.  It was a wonderful comparison, too.

            “It is!  They started it and we’re ending it!”  Cara shared a laugh with Sera, trying not to feel too flippant about what they had just done.  One glance at Cassandra, though, and she thought it would be alright: even the Seeker was grinning.  Solas surprised her by joining in the conversation as well.

            “Consider that this was necessary, however.  They did not have to attack us after all.  They had become little more than common thugs, preying upon the weak and defenseless.”

            “You’re a damper, aren’t you?”  It was quickly becoming clear that Solas and Sera were unlikely to ever be friends.  Solas ignored her.

            “That is not what the order stood for,” Cassandra inserted.  “Their behavior was unacceptable.”  They all agreed to that.

            “It seemed to have been some time since they had faced a mage of any talent.  It speaks of who they have been fighting on these rural roads.”  Solas leaned on his staff and muttered something in elvhen Cara didn’t understand.  Their cleaning done, it was once again time to move out. 

            “It’s been a long day,” Cara announced.  “I’m thinking we should find a decent camp for the night and we can look for the Grey Warden in the morning.”

            They found a decent camping place not too far from them right beside a pond.  There were even several blood lotus plants around that Cara collected for potions.  It turned out that they were a rather quiet party.  Well, Sera wasn’t, but she could only engage Cara for so long before they both ran out of topics.  When Sera tried talking to Solas, he ended up lecturing her on her indifference towards her people.  Cassandra usually just made disgusted noises that eventually prevented the elf from talking further.  Cara made the mistake of looking for firewood once, leaving her companions in camp.  She returned to shouting from Sera and angry looks from Solas.  After that she had someone else go.  It was a long evening, but eventually Cara managed to get Cassandra to tell her about Nevarra, which helped give everyone something else to think about rather than each other.  They quickly packed their things the next morning to search for the Grey Warden.  Cara just hoped he had some answers for them.

            “Does anyone have any idea where this Warden Blackwall is supposed to be?” she asked.

            “Leliana didn’t have much information,” Cassandra replied.

            “So, what, we’re just going to run through the Hinterlands looking for one Grey Warden we may not even recognize?  You’re daft, Herald.” 

            “Ever the optimist, aren’t you Sera?” Cara quipped sarcastically.  By now they were hiking up the hill behind their campsite.  Cara stopped at the top, trying to decide which way to go.  “We do need a better plan, though.  But since we don’t have one, let’s go this way.”  She pointed to her right in the direction of what she assumed was a larger lake, judging by the waterfall beside their camp.  They didn’t have to go far before seeing an armed man pacing in front of three others.  Cara drew the party to a halt, kneeling down to avoid being seen. 

            “Think that’s him, then?” Sera quietly asked.

            “I…I don’t know.  It looks like he’s trying to train those boys or something.  Why would a Warden do that?  Last I checked, there weren’t any darkspawn around.”

            “Perhaps we should try to get a closer look before announcing ourselves,” Solas suggested calmly. 

            Cara nodded and led the way, thankful for probably the first time that they had left their mounts at the forward camp when they arrived.  It was difficult finding a way around to where, hopefully, they wouldn’t be noticed.  Finally, they stood behind a small island in the middle of the lake.  Cara peaked around to try to identify the man they thought most likely to be the Warden, if any of them were, but she couldn’t tell.

            “Sera,” she whispered, “you can see better across distances.  See if you can tell.”

            “What should I look for?”

            “I don’t know.  But surely a Grey Warden would have something to distinguish himself.”  Sera carefully peaked around their cover and ducked right back.

            “Griffon on his chest, yeah?  Looks like a Grey Warden to me.”

            “Sounds good.  Now let’s just hope he’s helpful.”  Cara stood and climbed the bank away from the island.  The man she suspected was Blackwall didn’t seem to even notice their presence, which was probably good considering they had just climbed out of the lake.  When they got close enough to hear, she realized he was trying rally these boys.  They looked like farmers he had just pulled out of the field and she couldn’t help but wonder why on earth they were here.  Blackwall was lecturing them on proper usage of their shields. 

            “Blackwall?  Warden Blackwall?”  The man turned at the sound of Cara’s voice, looking completely surprised that she knew his name.  He turned away from his charges.

            “You’re not… How do you know my name?  Who sent—”  His statement was interrupted by an untimely arrow.  He caught it with his shield and Cara tried not to think about the fact that it probably would have killed her if he hadn’t seen it.  Several men stood on the other side of a lake-side house, one with a bow.  The others prepared to charge.  Cara assumed they were bandits.  “That’s it.  Help or get out.  We’re dealing with these idiots first.”  He then rallied his conscripts, as he called them.  Along with Cara and her party, who had little choice but to help, they made short work of the bandits. 

            It turned out that Blackwall had no useful information for the Inquisition, but he did want to help.  Cara couldn’t see any reason to turn down the aid of a Grey Warden, so she agreed. There was a lot to catch him up on, though, so she sent him back to Haven while she and her party finished what needed to be done in the Hinterlands.  They were about to part ways, but Cara stopped before leaving.  It might not be a great idea to send a random follower back to Haven without some sign that he was supposed to be there.

            “Warden, wait a moment.  I don’t think this will be necessary, but if anyone questions that I sent you, tell them…”  She had to think for a moment to decide on the right message.  It had to be something only she would know, just to be on the safe side.  “Ask for Commander Cullen and say his tactics book has been helpful.  He should understand that was from me since no one else was around at the time.”  Blackwall bobbed his head in understanding before they parted ways.  “Cassandra, remind me to have a talk with the advisors about this.  If we’re constantly sending people back to Haven, eventually we’re going to need a code or something.”

            “Oooh, can I help?”  Sera was practically bouncing with enthusiasm.  Cassandra groaned at the prospect.  Cara couldn’t help but grin; Sera’s enthusiasm was amusing.

            “I’ll let you know.  I’m sure there’s something we can come up with that will have them blushing.”  Cara and Sera laughed, though Cara knew it was probably best not to antagonize the Inquisition’s effective leaders.

 

* * *

 

            After finding new agents among the cultists in the hills, closing a few rifts, finding the last of the apostate caches, and a few other assorted tasks, Cara and the group left for the Storm Coast.  She had enjoyed the trip over the sea from the Free Marches and was thrilled to get to see it again.  It was a long trip from the Hinterlands to the Storm Coast, however.  Her companions were getting along better, thankfully.  At least, most of the time they were.  Cara just felt like she was playing “mother hen” sometimes when they got a little out of control.  About two days away from the forward camp Harding had established, Cara was digging around in one of Daisy’s saddlebags looking for Cullen’s tactics book.  She hadn’t had much chance to read yet, but she had the first watch tonight and thought it an excellent time for study.  She found the book, but was quite surprised when a small pouch fell out of the bag along with it that she was fairly certain she hadn’t put there.  Picking up the pouch, she opened it slightly to see a decent amount of dried mint.  Even more curious was the note she found along with the herb.

_Thought you would like some mint for your tea while you are on the road._

_Or for your own headaches.    CR_

            Cullen?  It took Cara a minute to figure out how he could have possibly known about her preference for mint in her tea until it suddenly dawned on her that she had put mint in the tea she shared with him in the council room after Val Royeaux.  So the Commander snuck a bag of mint into her pack for her to have while she was gone.  She smiled widely at the gesture; it had been a week since she had had mint in her tea and this was a welcome relief.  She immediately set about making herself a cup with the much-appreciated mint added.  She considered writing a note, but decided to just thank him when they returned.  Perhaps there was something she could get for him?  It may have just been a bag of mint, but she found it very sweet of him.  When her tea was ready, she smiled once again, breathing in its wonderful scent.

            “What are you so pleased about?” she heard Cassandra’s heavily accented voice ask her.  Cara jumped a little, but didn’t spill anything.  She looked up at Cassandra, still quite happy about her tea.

            “Oh, nothing.  The Commander just happened to find out I like mint in my tea and he slipped some in my bag without me knowing it.  I haven’t had a cup with mint since a couple of days after we left Haven and I’m thoroughly enjoying it.”  She felt like an idiot, especially when Cassandra raised an eyebrow like she didn’t believe her.

            “And how did the Commander come by this knowledge?”

            “It’s not like I keep it a secret or something.  But the night we returned from Val Royeaux, he caught me in the council room,” _more like scared me half to death_ , she thought, “and I shared my tea with him.  It had mint in it.”  It had been an amusing scene, once her heart had stopped pounding out of her chest.  Cassandra looked like she was trying to see right through her, though for what, Cara had no idea.

            “That was kind of the Commander, then.  Perhaps you should bring him something?”  Cassandra was trying very hard not let the slight grin on her lips show; she was failing miserably.

            “I thought of that.  I’m not sure what that would be.  It is just mint, after all.  If I didn’t like it in my tea so much, it wouldn’t be so sweet a gesture.  What in the name of the Andraste do you find so amusing?”  Cassandra started at getting caught grinning.

            “It is nothing.  I…I have never seen someone so appreciative of mint before.”  Cara suspected that was a lie, but said nothing.

            “What can I say?  I love mint and tea.  It’s not hard to make me happy.”  Cara smiled, hoping to put to rest whatever it was Cassandra found so amusing.  “I’m sorry, I’m being rude.  Would you like some?”

            “No thank you.  I won’t deprive you of such joy.  Goodnight, Cara.”  The Seeker ducked into her tent, leaving Cara to ponder what that was all about.  In the end she decided she didn’t really care; she had a book and her favorite kind of tea and that was all she needed right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided that Cassandra is the first to "see the writing on the wall," so to speak, about where Cara and Cullen are headed in the romance department, even before they have a clue. Being the romantic she is, she encourages it. Hope you all like this addition and, with luck, another chapter will be coming soon. Comments are always appreciated!


	6. Mercenaries on the Coast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally supposed to be a part of the last chapter, but I thought it went a little long, so I broke it into two. Hope you like it!

            “Scout Harding!” Cara greeted the dwarf as she and her party rode into camp.  “I see this perpetual rain hasn’t kept you away.”

            “No ma’am.  I hope you’re ready for a lot of it, though.  I don’t think it’s stopped since I got here.”

            “One point against the Storm Coast, then.  At least it’s pretty.”

            “And dangerous, Your Worship.  There’s a group of bandits operating in the area…”  Harding went on to explain the situation, which of course involved soldiers going missing, bandits, and no information on the Grey Wardens they had heard might be in the area. 

            “So, business as usual then?”  Harding chuckled.

            “Something like that.”                       

            “Well then, I’ll go try to find our people.  Have you heard anything about these Chargers we got word of?”  Cara was starting to hope they weren’t the bandits involved in their missing people.  It seemed like she could never count on anything being straight anymore.

            “We aren’t sure where they are right now, Your Worship, but we have seen them in the area.”  Cara said farewell to the scout, then turned to her party.

            “If we don’t know where these bandits or the mercenaries we’re looking for are, we should probably leave the horses here.  I don’t know this terrain well enough to trust they won’t get hurt.”  Her party agreed with minimal fuss, thankfully, and they turned their horses over to waiting hands. 

            Cara couldn’t quite decide how she felt about the Storm Coast.  It was extraordinarily wet with all the rain, not to mention the sea.  But everything was a beautiful shade of green that, when combined with the hills, made a very attractive picture.  Plus there were metal deposits everywhere and various herbs that would come in handy.  She could definitely think of worse places to be, despite the dampness.  Carefully she and her party picked their way down the hill away from camp.  She didn’t really know where they should go, but the sound of clanging swords decided they should head towards the sea.  Just down the hill from the camp they found a group fighting what appeared to be Tevinter agents.  Considering that Aclassi fellow had said they were supposed to be fighting a group of Tevinter mercenaries, Cara assumed this was the bunch she was looking for.  Seeing a Qunari rise above the heads of everyone else helped the assumption.  Cara was content to observe for a minute before doing anything.  After all, that was why they were here.  Aclassi had been correct; these Chargers _did_ do good work. 

            “It takes practice and trust to fight with as much precision as these mercenaries do,” Cassandra noted.

            “I take it you approve, then?” Cara asked.

            “I do not care for mercenaries as a general rule.  But these seem well behaved and we need the help.”  That was good enough for Cara.  Without a second thought, she led her own group to catch a couple of the stragglers trying to get away from the Chargers.  A couple of arrows from Sera, a dagger to the throat from Cara, and a few simple attacks from Cassandra and Solas and the Tevinters in front of them were dead.  That left Cara free to speak to Iron Bull, who was giving instructions to his company.  She noted how professional he seemed to be in his position.  After speaking for a few minutes about some of the details of their potential employment, Iron Bull had one more surprise for Cara. 

            “There’s one other thing.  Might be useful.  Might piss you off.”  _Great, more complications_ , Cara thought.  “Ever hear of the Ben-Hassrath?”  Cara had to think hard for that one.

            “A little bit, I think.  They’re a Qunari organization, right?  The equivalent of their guards and city watch.”

            “I’d go closer to ‘spies,’ but yeah, that’s them.”  He paused like he was nervous.  “Or, well, _us_.”  Iron Bull was a Ben-Hassrath?  _He’s freely telling me he’s a spy.  Is he insane?  Why couldn’t it have been a simple mercenary trying to do the right thing?_   She realized he had been speaking and she hadn’t really been listening.  “I’ve been ordered to join the Inquisition, get close to the people in charge, and send reports on what’s happening.”  _He_ is _insane.  That’s the only explanation._   “But I also get reports from all over Orlais.  You sign me on, I’ll share them with your people.”  Cara wasn’t entirely sure what to make of Iron Bull.  She had a lot of questions, but realized that this was a huge benefit for a lot of people. 

            “What would you send home in these reports of yours?”  The way she saw it, that was the most important question.  She couldn’t endanger the Inquisition, but if it was nothing serious…

            “Enough to keep my superiors happy.  Nothing that’ll compromise your operations.”  That was good enough for Cara.  They needed help, he was being upfront with her, and it would be relatively simple to have Leliana keep an eye on him to be on the safe side.

            “Alright.  You’re in.”  Agreeing to meet back in Haven, they parted ways.  This time, Cara didn’t give them a code or anything; this group was already expected.

            There was still the matter of their missing soldiers to deal with before leaving the Storm Coast.  Cara didn’t want to leave that until later.  After searching for quite some time, they found resistance near a couple seemingly abandoned buildings.  Solas was ready with a barrier for them and Sera found a perfect spot for her talents by sneaking around to one building and climbing a ladder to the roof.  On Cara’s signal, she and Cassandra charged the two closest to them, Cassandra with her usual brute force and Cara with the chain she had learned to pull herself with.  The two of them were becoming quite formidable by themselves.  With Solas pelting the bandits with ice and fire and Sera raining arrows on the other archers, their enemies stood no chance against them.  While looking around the battlefield for anything valuable, Cara considered what Cassandra had said of the Chargers, that it takes practice and trust.  She smiled thinking about it; in many ways, their group worked the same way.  Her smile was quickly removed, however, when she entered one of the buildings to find dead Inquisition soldiers.  She was upset that this had been their fate and angry at their murderers, who they presumably had just dealt with.  She kept balling her hand into a fist, trying not to hit something, and biting the inside of her cheek.  It was a relief to find a piece of paper detailing where their camp was located.  Violence wasn’t her inherent nature, but these particular bandits earned her wrath by attacking the Inquisition, albeit indirectly.

            “It would appear we may be able to challenge the bandit leader,” Solas said after skimming through a book he found.  “With a medallion which looks easy to craft, you could challenge their leader and take his place.”

            “And just why would I want to do that?” Cara snapped.  “If you hadn’t notice, they killed Inquisition soldiers.”  She was vaguely aware of Cassandra watching her looking concerned.

            “We do need aid, Herald.  Perhaps you should not be so quick to discount those under an imprudent commander.  Besides, more death will not bring these soldiers back.”  She didn’t want to admit it, but he was right on all counts.  She stalked out of the building, finding a decent place to sit on the cliff with her feet dangling over the edge, staring out over the water and trying to calm herself.  Why was she so upset?  This wasn’t the first time she’s seen death and it wouldn’t be the last.  These soldiers knew the risks.  And yet it all felt…personal.  Cassandra joined her a few minutes later.

            “He’s right, you know.”  The Seeker wasn’t one to mince words.

            “I know.  It just feels…wrong.”  Cassandra nodded, but said nothing.  “I didn’t think we were trying fix everything just so wrong-doers could get away with their crimes.”

            “We aren’t.  But as far as we know, the killers are now on the ground behind us.  The only other person likely involved is their leader.  Remove him and the rest will follow you.  You can put them to whatever purpose you see fit.  You can even think of it as penance if you like.”

            “That…actually helps.  Thank you.”  The pair walked back into the building after a few moments.  “I’m sorry, Solas.  I shouldn’t have snapped at you.  There is enough death in the world; I shouldn’t be so keen to add to it.”

            “No apology necessary, Herald.  You are upset at the death of Inquisition soldiers, a wholly understandable response.”

            “Nevertheless, I should remember alternatives.”  She took a calming breath before returning to business.  It was rather alarming to consider how angry she had been at these bandits.  It wasn’t as if she had known these soldiers.  Still, she felt like her family had been attacked.  “Now, how do we challenge their leader?”

 

            The leader of the Hessarian mercenaries was dead beneath Cara’s daggers.  She was kneeling on one knee, panting and trying to catch her breath before pulling her daggers out of the man’s chest.  It had been a difficult fight, but true to what the book had said, there was no intervention from anyone.  It had just been her against this brute of a thug while her companions kept his hounds off of her.  The compound was quiet and she could feel the shock ripple through those in attendance.  Finally, she pulled her weapons free and slowly stood after wiping the blood on the dead man’s clothes.  She had several cuts, a broken finger, and she thought she might have a fractured rib or two from being at the wrong end of his axe’s pommel.  Looking around, she did indeed see many shocked faces among the Hessarians.  She kept her daggers out just in case, but moved to speak to them.

            “You’re leader is dead by lawful challenge.  We are the Inquisition and we offer you a chance to do something better for the world.  Do you accept my rule?”  Several looks passed among the group.  Cara began to get nervous when no one said anything for a full minute.  Finally, one man stepped forward.

            “You wear Mercy’s Crest and you challenged our leader. It was fair, so we will abide by the outcome.  The Blades of Hessarian are yours to do with as you see fit, Herald of Andraste.”  The man saluted her, along with several others.  Only then did she feel it appropriate to sheath her daggers. 

            “Then we welcome the Blades of Hessarian to our ranks.  I can’t say where this will lead, but right now we need you right here.  Protect the Storm Coast and report any suspicious activity to the Inquisition.  No more raiding, pillaging, or murdering.  Let us worry about your pay.  If you have questions or concerns, address them to the Inquisition in Haven.  We also have scouts and soldiers maintaining basic camps in the area if you need them for any reason.”  After a few parting words, and some healing from Solas, Cara and her party left the compound to return to the forward camp.  It was time they returned to Haven.  Sera bounded up beside her while they walked.

            “So, you have your very own band of mercenaries under your thumb.  Bet you didn’t see that comin’, right?”  Cara gave a breathy laugh.

            “I can’t say I did, no.”

            “What do you plan to do with such an acquisition?” Solas questioned.

            “I might be their technical leader, but I think I’ll let Commander Cullen work with this one.  He might not like it, but how can he turn down recruits?  Or I suppose if the Inquisition doesn’t work out for me, I can return here and lead them myself.  Might have to set up a new rule for changing power, though…”

            “So, what, you’ll just start up a life of crime or somethin’?  Thought you were better than stealing from travelers.”  Sera was obviously displeased.

            “Oh, no, that’s the beauty of it,” Cara was quick to say.  “We’ll hit richer targets to spread needed items to people who require them.  Of course, we’ll need some money ourselves, but I’m sure whoever we hit can part with it.  Who knows?  Maybe we can be one of your Red Jennies.”  Cara’s wide smile indicated clearly that she was joking.  Sera laughed.

            “There is only one problem with your backup plan,” Solas said as he walked past them, using his staff to lean on.  Cara could see a grin on his face.  “Do you really believe the people will forget the Herald of Andraste?  Even without the Inquisition, you would be well-known throughout Fereldan in particular.  Try to accomplish anything surreptitiously when everyone knows who you are.”  He walked completely past Cara and Sera then, leaving them to stare at his back.  Then Cara started laughing.  He was right of course, but she couldn’t believe he had participated in that conversation!

 

 

            Cassandra was walking behind her companions after leaving the mercenaries’ compound.  She wasn’t really paying attention to what they were talking about, being wrapped up in her own thoughts.  Cara and Cassandra had known each other for several weeks now and the Seeker would be comfortable considering them friends, or at least well on their way to being such.  But over the past two days, Cassandra had started to see something in the Herald she hadn’t really expected.  Yesterday when they found out what had happened to their people, Cara had been angry and upset, like the whole thing had been a personal attack.  With very little coaxing, however, she calmed herself and did the sensible thing rather than lashing out at those she blamed for the loss.  Then, watching her in the compound today, she watched in awe as Cara took charge of the situation.  Cara had been sure of herself throughout their meeting in Val Royeaux, but every now and then she would glance to one of her companions as if for approval or guidance. Today there had been none of that.  Cassandra was Nevarran royalty, a Seeker of Truth, the Right Hand of the Divine, and the woman who declared the Inquisition reborn; she was not easily impressed. But little by little, Cara was impressing her.  Cassandra may have been the one to start this organization, at least officially, but she had never wanted to lead it.  However, she knew that they would eventually need someone to oversee everything.  It was working well for the moment, but it wouldn’t forever.  She had assumed perhaps Josephine would take charge, maybe Leliana or Cullen.  After today, though, she began to think that maybe it was Cara who needed to lead them instead.  She wouldn’t speak of her ideas to anyone else, of course, but when the time came, she would very likely put forward Cara as the most logical choice for Inquisitor.


	7. Fights and Presents

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been holding off on this one because I'm afraid it's too much in one chapter, but oh well. I'm posting it anyway! I would love to hear what you think of it. It's a little bit longer than my chapters usually are, but I hope you like it!

            “You’re putting me in charge of what?”  Cullen had heard what the Herald had said, but he was holding onto a shred of hope that he had been wrong. 

            “They call themselves the Blades of Hessarian.  They were bandits, but I defeated their leader, so now they answer to me.  I thought you could put them to better use than I could.  They will be loyal; the challenge was fair and I think they will follow what the Inquisition says.”

            “They’re _bandits_.  Bandits who killed our people!  What were you thinking?”  If he hadn’t already been dealing with a horrible headache, he probably would have more rational, but he just couldn’t see the logic in this.  “They can’t be trusted, Herald.”

            “I know they killed our people and I wasn’t happy about it either.  I’m _not_ happy about it.  But we dealt with those directly responsible and now we can repurpose those left.  I’m not saying we need to trust them with delicate tasks or even anything outside of the Storm Coast.  We need the people and they could be valuable in protecting the Coast.  You of all people should see the value in this.”  He could see that Cara was getting irritated.  Why would she give him bandits, though?  And here he had thought the mercenaries she sent back were bad. 

            “Excuse me, but I didn’t think we were completely desperate for numbers.  Where shall we look next?  Prisons?”

            “We can’t just condemn everyone based on past indiscretions.  I don’t expect us to take anyone with no questions asked.  But if we didn’t at least give people a chance, you wouldn’t have a Herald, would you?” 

            “You have proven yourself repeatedly.  How can you even make that comparison?”

            “I only got the chance because you all needed my mark!  As I recall, Cassandra was ready to kill me on the spot.  But she didn’t; I got a chance.”

            “You wanted to help!”

            “How do you know they don’t?”

            “They’re bandits that killed our people!”

            “So the only potential criminals we can accept are those who have been divinely touched and say they want to help?  If we start making distinctions now, we won’t like where we end up.”

            “That doesn’t change the fact that they are bandits who have been preying upon Maker knows who.  I say they can’t be trusted.  We don’t need numbers that badly!” 

            “Fine!  Then why don’t you deal with it?  You can tell them we won’t be needing them and see what they turn to!”  She glared at him menacingly.  The anger in her eyes made Cullen feel like she could set him on fire with just a little more intensity.  He didn’t recoil, but seeing her calm demeanor slip so suddenly made it all the more fierce.  “And while we’re at it, why don’t you be the one out there day after day making decisions!  If you don’t trust me to do what has to be done, maybe I shouldn’t be the face of this operation!  A title like Herald of Andraste won’t get us very far if I’m too incompetent to make choices that have to be made without consultation!”  Neither of them spoke, just looked at each other with glares that could possibly pierce armor if they tried.  After a couple minutes, Josephine cleared her throat, ever the one to try to make peace.

            “Perhaps we could table this concern for later?  It does not need action today.”  Cullen started at her voice; he had forgotten she, Leliana, and Cassandra were in the room.  No one else dared speak.  He could only see Cassandra without turning and her eyes were wide with surprise. 

            “Fine,” Cara bit out.  They glared a moment longer before she turned swiftly for the door.  She stopped with her hand on the handle, then turned back around and fished through a pouch on her belt.  She didn’t look at anyone, but threw a pouch onto the table in front of him.  It hit with a loud clank and Cara returned to the door, opening it with more force than necessary. 

            Cullen had no idea what was in the pouch, but he picked it up carefully while his fellow advisors left the room.  After that display, he wasn’t surprised they would leave so quickly.  Whatever was in the pouch was solid, though small.  When he opened it, he caught the scent of mint.  Inside was a small figurine of a mabari along with a note.  His stomach felt like it dropped to his feet when he realized what this pouch had contained.  After reading the note, all he could do was groan and bury his head in his hand.

_Thanks for the mint.  It was a wonderful surprise.  I found this in a chest on the_

_Storm Coast.  Now you have your very own mabari to remind you of Fereldan_

_no matter where the Inquisition goes._

 

 

* * *

          He still felt like an idiot.  No, idiot didn’t seem to do this feeling justice.  Buffoon, perhaps?  He hadn’t seen Cara since their fight that morning, not even at dinner, but time hadn’t helped anything other than increasing his discomfort.  And increase the pain in his head.  Yes, he had put a bag of mint in her saddlebag, but he had never expected her to give him something in return.  The mabari figurine had been perfect, too.  Any Fereldan who didn’t love mabaris couldn’t truly be considered a Fereldan.  And this had come from a Marcher! 

            It had been a long afternoon following the meeting, half of which Cullen barely even remembered.  There had been the usual training, reports, and logistics to see to, and half of that still needed finished this evening.  After reading the same report for the fifth time, however, and still not knowing what it said, Cullen gave up trying to work.  So he decided to take a walk.  The walk quickly turned into a trip to the Herald’s quarters, though.  He wasn’t going to permit this to stand without some sort of conversation.  He only hesitated a moment before knocking on her door.

            “Come in!” Cara called.  Her voice sounded tense through the door and Cullen mentally kicked himself yet again for the altercation.  Pushing open the door, he found Cara sitting in the middle of her floor with several objects and an open book scattered around her.  She glanced up at him as he closed the door behind him.  “Can I help you, Commander?”

            “Do you have a moment, Herald?”  Cara caught his eye for a moment and sighed, but stood, crossing the room to busy herself with something before she spoke.

            “What is it?”  Cullen hadn’t moved from the door, so Cara came to him.  With a cup of tea, of course.  She gestured him into the room.  “Find a seat, if you’d like.”  He took a seat in the corner beside her bed before speaking.  Cara sat on her bed with her own cup.

            “I wanted to apologize, Hera—Cara.  That argument this morning was completely uncalled for and I make no excuse for it.”  Cara was facing him, but staring into her teacup.  A sad smirk crossed her face when she scoffed at him.

            “I suppose I didn’t really help matters.  I didn’t explain myself very well.  I just got angry and didn’t stop to think how it looks.”

            “You don’t have to explain.  You’re right.”

            “I know I am.  But…  This isn’t just about numbers.  Yes, we need help.  But what we are doing, what we’re preparing to do, is something Thedas hasn’t seen in living memory.  All people know is judgment and callousness.  If we’re going to have any kind of impact on anything, we have to be different.  We can’t make judgments like ‘they were bandits.’  We need to be a chance for something better.  We won’t be everything to everyone.  We may not even succeed.  But we can’t be more of the same.  And that starts here.”  She looked up at him and he could see the passion written plainly in her features.  “I’m not saying we aren’t careful or that we need to trust everyone.  But we can’t write people off for their pasts, either.”  Cullen sat in stunned silence for a moment.  _This_ had been what she was wanting him to see this morning?

            “That was very…passionate.”  That earned him a more earnest smile.

            “I’m just glad it made sense.  I won’t say I was happy about the idea.  I nearly bit Solas’ head off when he suggested we could challenge the leader.  But he and Cassandra were both right; more death wasn’t going to fix anything.  This way, there’s at least a chance.”  Cullen sipped his tea thoughtfully, then nodded.

            “I suppose I can’t argue with that.  May I humbly ask your forgiveness, then?”

            “I don’t think there’s anything to forgive.  You were doing your job and you aren’t entirely wrong.  That was something I probably shouldn’t have just sprung on you like that.  Do you forgive me?”  She looked like she was biting her lip.  Cullen grinned.

            “I don’t think there’s anything to forgive.  Shall we simply agree to converse better on such matters in the future?”

            “Agreed.”  Cara’s smile finally touched her eyes.  Cullen smiled back, but he couldn’t help but think that his own stubbornness had very nearly lost him someone he considered an incredibly close friend.  For just a moment, his mind created a world where he and Cara were no longer friends and it seemed like a very dark place, one he never wanted to see.  Remembering the other reason he came to see her, he tore himself from her piercing eyes to pull the mabari figurine out of a pouch on his belt.

            “I also wanted to thank you.  I’m not sure I deserve this after this morning, but I appreciate it all the same.”  Cara laughed.

            “I should be thanking you!  I was quite surprised to find your offering in my bag.  I somehow had managed to miss it for over a week.  It might have been the best cup of tea I’ve ever had!”  Cullen chuckled, thrilled she enjoyed his offering so much.  “The gift was somewhat Cassandra’s idea, though.  She caught me enjoying the mint and suggested I get you something in return.  I had no idea what that would be, but I found that mabari in a chest and it made me think of you for some reason.  You Fereldans do love your mabaris, after all.”  She had adopted a teasing tone and a devilish smirk.

            “We do love our mabaris!  Every Fereldan boy wants one.  Few ever get them, but still.”

            “Well now you can carry a little piece of Fereldan with you, no matter where you go.” 

            “Thank you,” he said again.  “You really didn’t have to do that.  It was just mint, after all.”

            “I take my mint very seriously, Commander.”  They smiled at each other before Cullen drained his cup and stood to leave.  He had managed to forget about his headache for a while, but it came crashing back on him as soon as he stood up, causing him to stumble and catch the first thing he could find for support.  It turned out to be the post of Cara’s bed.  He had slammed his eyes shut for a moment and when he opened them again, Cara was holding his other arm.  He hadn’t even heard her get up.  “Don’t move,” she ordered.  Backing away slowly to make sure he remained upright, she quickly grabbed another chair and placed it by the hearth, then returned to his side.  “Come here.”

            “I’m fine.  Don’t worry about it.”  He let her lead him to the chair anyway.

            “You’re not fine.  You’re white as a sheet and I’m not going to let you walk across the village like that.  Now just sit still.”  She shoved him down on the seat and stepped away.  Cullen turned to see what she was doing, but pain shot up to his temples once again.

            “What are you doing?”

            “I’m trying to help you.  Just stay still a moment.  Do you trust me?”  This time Cullen was able to turn enough to see her by the hearth.  He caught her eye, finding her looking rather determined no matter his answer.  Because of their fight that morning, he made sure to look her directly in the eye when he spoke.

            “I trust you,” he said, hoping she understood that he meant more than just the current situation.  The warm smile she gave him indicated that she did.

            “Good.  Then lean back and close your eyes.”  He did as he was told.  After a few moments, he felt her hands on his temples and he could feel the callouses she had developed from her daggers.  Her skin was surprisingly hot.  It felt amazing, but he had no idea why she was so warm.  The question slipped from him, though, when she started pressing her fingertips into his temples with just the right amount of pressure.  A groan accidentally escaped his lips.  “I’m not hurting you, am I?”

            “Mmmmm,” was all he could manage.

            “I’ll take that as a no,” she said and he could hear her smile.  She continued working for the next five minutes, pressing and rolling her fingers around his temples, across his forehead, and down the back of his neck, at least as far as his armor would let her.  Each time her fingers cooled, she would step away and return with warm fingers again.  Nothing had ever been able to touch his headaches when they got this bad, but somehow Cara had done the impossible.  He silently marveled at just how many ways she continued to surprise him.  If she could diminish the symptoms of lyrium withdraw, what else could she do?  After five minutes, he finally looked up, finding himself staring straight into her bright green eyes.  “Better?”

            “Much.”

            “Good.”  She walked back over to the hearth and he realized that she was sticking her hands nearly in the fire to warm them.

            “Makers breath, Cara!  You don’t have to burn yourself for me!”  He started to get up to stop her, but she pushed him back into the seat.  Moving behind him, she began working her fingers into the back of his neck again.

            “Don’t worry about me.  I’m used to it.”

            “You’re used to sticking your hands in a fire?”  Maker, what _wouldn’t_ this woman do?  She laughed.

            “It’s nothing horrible, I promise.  My brother and I were close when we were younger and I sometimes would play with him and his other friends.  Boys will be boys, you know.  So when they started testing their tolerance, I suppose you could call it, I was often there, watching them stick their hands in fires.  Not to be outdone, I would stick my hand in the fire too.  You build up a bit of an immunity to the heat after a while.”  Cullen chuckled.  He remembered doing similar things with his brother and their friends as children.

            “Just so long as there is no damage to the Herald.  We wouldn’t want her getting injured trying to rid the Commander of a headache.”

            “Oh, I don’t know.  I can think of worse ways to get injured.”  Cullen cocked an eyebrow in her general direction.  “I could fall off a bridge.  Or off a rock while trying to collect iron.  Maybe a papercut that gets infected or something.  Have an ex-Templar knock me around a little too hard during training.”  He looked around to see one side of her mouth turned up in a grin and a twinkle in her eye. 

            “I’ll have to ensure that any former Templars we have in our ranks treat our Herald gently, then.”

            “Please do.  I’m fragile, you know.”  She smiled at him a moment before patting his arm.  “There, try standing this time.”  He could still feel the barest edges of his headache, but this time when he stood, he didn’t nearly topple over.  Looking at the floor, he finally noticed what she had been working on when he arrived. 

            “Is this a battle plan?”

            “I suppose you could call it that,” she said as she came around to stand beside him and look at her pieces on the floor.  “I was trying to figure out a better way to use my companions to their full abilities.  It’s not going as well as I had hoped.”  She made a face at the floor, obviously displeased with her progress.  Cullen stepped around for another angle.

            “Here, try this,” he said, getting down on one knee and shifting some pieces around.  By the time he left an hour later, his headache was nearly gone, Cara had some new strategies to try, and both of them felt infinitely better than they had all day.


	8. A Return to Haven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara and Cullen return to Haven after a trip to the Hinterlands, but it isn't an uneventful venture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For all those following this fic, I'm really sorry for the long wait between chapters. Real life has a tendency to get in the way sometimes. :) This chapter does end rather abruptly, but every other ending I tried I despised, so please forgive the ending. Without further ado, here is chapter 8 and I hope you enjoy it!

            Haven wasn’t the easiest place to get to.  It was in the Frostback Mountains, hidden by valleys and peaks until you were almost upon the village.  In retrospect, Cullen supposed it was that which had made this a perfect place for the cultists who had resided here ten years ago and for the Temple of Sacred Ashes before that.  At least there was a road, winding though it may be.  The mountains were too steep in many areas for a road to go straight to Haven, so travellers were forced to zigzag their way up the path, slowly rising in altitude.  Heights weren’t a problem for him, but even he got a little dizzy looking down at times.  Cara, on the other hand, seemed to be having some difficulty.  She had convinced him to come with her for the final negotiations with Master Dennet, saying it was time he got out of Haven.

            “You need to get out of Haven,” she had said to him.  “It’s easy to forget what we’re doing out there if you never leave.  Besides, I’m sure Master Dennet would like to meet the man many of his horses are going to.”  Cara had a way of convincing him of things even when he wanted to argue, so he had agreed to join her and Cassandra.  Cassandra had managed to convince Dennet to join the Inquisition, so they returned earlier.  Cara and Cullen were travelling more slowly, which he was enjoying despite the knowledge that he needed to return to his troops. 

            Looking at Cara, who rode beside and slightly ahead of him, he noticed once again how nervous she looked.  She had grown quiet about half way up the mountain and had said little since then.  Her knuckles were nearly white on the reigns and he would see her occasionally peer over the edge with uncertainty.  They had only known each other a few weeks, but she had never shown that she had any fears.  It was appearing as though heights might be a problem, however.  Cara’s nervousness was starting to infect her mare, Daisy, and he feared the consequences.

            “You should try to calm yourself.  Daisy is picking up on your fear and getting antsy.”  Cara didn’t look at him, but turned her head slightly to listen.

            “Oh, right.  Sorry Daisy,” she said patting the horse’s neck.

            “Heights aren’t something to be scared of, though I understand many people are.”

            “What?”  This time she did look at him, if only for a moment.  “I’m not afraid of heights.  Not really, anyway.  It’s just…Did you ever think of something you really wish you hadn’t thought of because you were a lot better off in naïve ignorance?”

            “I…suppose everyone has.  Are we still talking about heights?”  Sometimes her train of thought was difficult to follow. 

            “Sort of.  I’m not the best rider and it suddenly occurred to me a while ago that it’s a long way down this mountain if I get thrown off.”

            “I wouldn’t worry too much about that.  Daisy is an excellent mount and well-trained.”

            “It’s not Daisy I’m worried about…,” Cara replied quietly.  “What about you?  I take it you’re good with heights?”

            “A healthy respect for them only.  They don’t bother me, but I’m not going to try anything foolish either.  I’ve heard of people who can’t stand to walk up to the second floor of a building, though.  I can’t imagine that kind of aversion.”  Cara grimaced.

            “My Aunt Loreen is like that.  We have to find room for her on the first floor when she visits, or give her the one room in the manor without a window.  We had to put her in the servant’s quarters one year when she came to a soiree unexpectedly.  She protested, of course, but was told that it was either that, or a corner room with four windows on the third floor. She didn’t visit as much after that.”  Cullen chuckled, glad to see that Cara was starting to relax somewhat.  “I always thanked the Maker when she would visit that I wasn’t like that.  Me?  I just get nervous around fishing hooks.  I can live with that.”

            “Fishing hooks,” Cullen said with a hint of disbelief.

            “Yep.  I saw someone get a fishing hook stuck in their cheek years ago and like an idiot, I watched them get it out.  With all the barbs and stuff…”  She shuddered slightly.  “I’ve been nervous around them ever since.  But that’s not so bad.  There are plenty of other things that would be far more problematic to be afraid of.”

            “Very true,” he said, trying not to think on his own fears.  He was thankful that she didn’t ask him to share them; that was something he was definitely not prepared to talk about with her.

            They rode on in silence for a while longer.  Snow started falling and it appeared that Haven had received a good measure of snow while they had been gone.  It clung to the branches above them like a second skin.  Several branches were even drooping under the weight.  There was nothing quite like the absolute silence which often accompanied snow and Cullen found himself paying more attention to the silence and serenity it offered than anything else, something he chastised himself for when a snow-laden branch broke off a tree.  It landed on the road, seeming much louder because of the quiet.  The sudden crack and movement, however, caused the already-nervous Daisy to panic.  Cara did the best she could to calm the frightened animal, but it reared back and she couldn’t hold on.  She fell off with a cry, landing on the edge of the road and rolling off down the bank and onto the road beneath them.  Cullen had never been so glad for the zigzagged road on this mountain.

            Daisy ran off, but Cullen was far more concerned about Cara.  He swiftly turned his horse to retreat down the road and around the bend to reach her.  She was lying still on her stomach and didn’t appear to be moving.  He said a silent prayer that she would be alright.  If she was hurt because he hadn’t been paying attention, he would never forgive himself.  Cullen sighed with relief when she started pushing herself up right before he reached her.  Her shoulders were shaking and he couldn’t see her face as he swung off his horse.  He started to reach for her, but stopped.  After rushing down here to help her, he had no idea what to do now that she didn’t seem to need it.  Instead, he got down on one knee in front of her.

            “Herald?”  Cara sat back on her heels.  Much to Cullen’s surprise, he found she was laughing hysterically.  She was no longer able to keep her laughter silent when she looked up at him, likely seeing concern and confusion written all over his face. 

            “When we get things calmed down, I swear the first thing we’re doing is finding a better route to Haven!  I don’t care if I have to build it myself!”  She was still laughing and Cullen couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped his lips.  He had a sudden image of Cara traversing leagues of terrain looking for a route that suited her and in the end threatening canyons with her mark until they complied.

            “I’m sure the mountains will bow to the Herald of Andraste’s will, my lady,” he said in a teasing tone.  Cara started laughing even harder.  After a minute, her laughter finally subsided and she wiped tears from her eyes.  Cullen didn’t think the situation was _that_ amusing, but he supposed this was probably a better reaction than terror.

            “I’m sorry.  Nature, it appears, has a sense of humor.”

            “At least you are alright.  You don’t seem to be hurt, apart from a few scrapes.”  He started to stand up, but she stopped him.

            “Actually, I’m quite the opposite.  I’m fairly certain I dislocated my shoulder with that fall.  Not to mention I have no idea where Daisy is.”

            “You sat there laughing after dislocating your shoulder?”  Cullen was incredulous.  “Let me see.  It may not be able to wait until Haven.” Care turned so that her right shoulder faced him.  Gingerly, he felt around her shoulder, noting how she winced when he got too close to the injured area.  It was indeed dislocated, but he wasn’t sure what to do with it.  He had dealt with the problem before, but it was usually in the field where there were no other options.  “Can you move it at all?”

            “Not really.  I can at least move my fingers, but the rest is a little difficult.”  Cullen carefully weighed his options.

            “I think I’m going to have to pop it back in place.”

            “Agreed.  If you didn’t, I was going to, somehow.  I won’t be able to even catch Daisy like this, much less have a hope of riding her.  How do we do this?”  Cullen moved to a better position, keeping Cara on her knees.

            “This is going to hurt,” he said, grasping her arm and shoulder.

            “I know.  Just be quick.”  She dug her fingers into the snow in front of him, preparing for the pain.  “And no countdowns or anything.  Let’s just get this over with before I know—”  Cullen cut her off with the swift motion of moving her shoulder back into position.  Cara gripped the snow beneath her even harder and groaned through clenched teeth.  He thought she was trying not to scream.  She started to fall forward, but he caught her.  Kneeling down in front of her, he held onto her shoulders, making sure his grasp on her injury was gentle.

            “I’m sorry.  You wanted quick.”  She nodded and finally looked up.

            “I did.  Thank you.  Maker!  I’ve had sword wounds that didn’t hurt that much!  Come on, help me up.  We’ll have to go find Daisy.” 

            “I imagine she’s halfway back to Haven by now.  We’ll get you up on my horse and I’ll walk.”

            “I would love to object to that, Commander, but I don’t think I could walk to Haven right now,” Cara laughed as she took his hand to stand.

            Once she was in the saddle, they started off once again, Cara riding and Cullen holding the reigns beside her so she wouldn’t have to.  They didn’t see Daisy the entire way to Haven, which Cara confided worried her.  After a couple of hours, they finally saw Haven come into view.  What surprised them, however, was the fuss by the stable that immediately stopped once they arrived.  Apparently Daisy had found her way home by herself, but without her rider, worried minds prevailed and they were preparing a search party to find the Herald and Commander.  Relief was on every face, until they got to the part of the story that Cara was injured, then the worry returned as they rushed her into the care of a healer who could do more than Cullen had.  After speaking to Cassandra briefly, Cullen made sure his mount was being taken care of and turned his mind back to his troops; there was likely a mountain of reports awaiting his attention after his absence.  Part of him wanted to check on Cara first, but he decided to ask about her later, certain she was in good hands.


	9. After Therinfal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara's adventures at Therinfal Redoubt have some unforeseen side effects.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty self-explanatory. Cara chooses the Templars over the mages and has to deal with this after the fact. As always, comments are always appreciated and I hope you enjoy it!

            Cara was ecstatic to be back in Haven after the mess she had found at Therinfal Redoubt, but her toil with the envy demon had produced a side effect she hadn’t anticipated.  Because of the demon’s tricks, she was slightly uncomfortable being in the same room as Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen.  It wasn’t so much that she was afraid of them; she knew none of what the demon had used against her would come to pass.  And yet every time she was around any of the advisors, she couldn’t stop images from creeping up on her.  She had decided to omit that part when she reported back to them.  It was bad enough that she had seen it; they didn’t need to know about it too.  Still, she was cordial and they worked together, but it wasn’t always easy.  The day after Cara had returned from Therinfal, she saw Leliana hand Cullen a knife and Cara had to work to hide her wince.  Josephine had snuck up on her later that afternoon and Cara had to fight against her impulse to draw her blades.  No one asked her, but she suspected they had noticed her strange behavior. 

            After the whole ordeal, Cara wanted nothing but a sense of normalcy.  Even so, it was two days before she could force herself to be alone with Cullen long enough for training.  She had found several excuses to stop on her way to the clearing they had claimed for their exercises.  She spoke to Varric, helped a villager carry a jug of water, brought her chestnut mount Daisy an apple, looked at a couple of schematics Harrit had obtained, and stopped a heated argument between two soldiers.  All the while she told herself that it all needed done instead of admitting that she was nervous.  Finally, however, she made her way into the clearing where Cullen was waiting on her with their wooden training weapons on the ground beside him.  He looked up at her when she approached.

            “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming,” he said.

            “I’m sorry.  There must have been half a dozen people that needed to speak with me right that minute.  I didn’t realize how tied up I had gotten.”  It was a bit of a lie, but what could she say?  Explaining that she had stopped at every opportunity to avoid this would be extremely awkward, to say the least.

            “We can always miss a day, if—”

            “No,” Cara forced herself to interrupt, though she was finding it difficult to maintain eye contact.  “That shouldn’t be necessary.  I think I’ve already seen half of Haven anyway.”  She was grateful to see him smirk at her half-hearted joke.  “Besides, it will be nice to do something straightforward instead of politics, decisions, and demons.”  The thought of dealing with any more of that made her wrinkle her nose in disgust.  Cullen laughed.

            “You’re probably right about that.  Even the Herald of Andraste should be granted a reprieve on occasion, even if it is only to train.”

           With that they took their practice weapons and began their dance of movements around each other, blocking, striking, parrying, and even a little fancy footwork.  Cara felt a great deal of tension leave her while they moved.  Training was simple and uncomplicated, and the fact that Cullen was just easy to be around made her feel better, despite her nervousness over the envy demon’s tricks.  One of them would occasionally say something, but they were mostly quiet, focusing on each other.  Cara was becoming much better against Cullen, though he usually got in more hits than she did.  Still, she sometimes got her own hits in.  She had almost forgotten about her nerves when, in the course of some footwork, Cullen got behind her and gently prodded her back with his wooden sword.  Gasping, Cara jumped forward and turned toward Cullen, raising her dagger in a slightly threatening manner, despite it being wood.  Her reaction was more extreme than it should have been and Cullen’s eyes went wide with surprise.  He shifted his sword so that the point was on the ground to look less threatening and lowered his shield to his side.  It only took a moment for Cara to realize what she had done and lowered her own dagger, her face turning pink.  She looked down and turned away with the back of a hand to her forehead, knowing she would have to explain.  She couldn’t believe she had reacted that way.

           “I’m sorry,” she said quietly when she found her voice.

           “Are you alright?”

           “Yes…mostly.”  Turning around, she idly flipped her daggers and took her stance, motioning him to continue.  He looked at her cautiously, then acquiesced.  He attacked a couple of times before speaking.

           “Are you going to tell me what that was about?”

           “I would prefer not to.”  Cara struck and Cullen blocked the blow.  He didn’t respond for several minutes while they continued to strike and block.  When he knocked her onto the ground with his shield, however, he stood above her with his training sword pressed against her chest just enough to keep her in place.

           “We are friends, Cara, are we not?  I have noticed those small winces and how stiff you become whenever Leliana, Josephine, or myself are around.  I’m assuming this has something to do with the envy demon, so why don’t you tell me.  What happened that suddenly has you so frightened of us?”  Cullen’s eyes were warm, but mixed with concern and hurt.

           “Please don’t ask me that,” she said quietly.

           “I am asking.  Is it really that bad?”

           “Yes and no.  It wasn’t real, which helps.  But I still witnessed it.”  Cara sighed before looking at him pointedly.  “Are you certain you want to know?  Sometimes people are just better off not knowing something.”

           “I’m certain.”  She had expected the answer, but she still wished he hadn’t said it.  Resigned to the situation, she shoved his sword off her chest and stood up.  Leaving her training daggers on the ground, she drew one of her real ones, flipping it over and over in her hand while gathering her thoughts.  Her back was to him; she didn’t want to see his reaction.

           “You’re right; it was the envy demon.  I told you that it wanted to become me and it used several methods of breaking me.  The first it tried was…well, it was you.  You, Josephine, and Leliana.  I have no idea why.”  She continued twisting, twirling, and flipping her dagger while she spoke, seeing the scene in her mind yet again.  “I didn’t know where I was or what was going on.  But the three of you seemed to be there.  Images the demon produced, of course, but I didn’t know that right away.  It spoke through your images, starting with Leliana.  As Leliana, it…”  She hated this part and took a steadying breath.  “It slit your throat.  Then as Josephine it crept up behind me, disappearing when I turned around.  After telling me that I would serve the Elder One by dying in the right way, it turned back into you.  You— _it_ — stabbed a shadowy version of me in the back and I swear I could almost feel it.”  She jumped when she felt him lightly place his hand on her lower back, where he had tapped her with his sword earlier.  He caught her gaze and held it for a moment before speaking.

           “You know none of that was real, right?  It was all just a trick.”

           “I know.  Envy wanted to become me and it used that, along with everything else, to learn my reactions.  But I keep seeing the whole thing and it makes me jumpy.  I saw Leliana give you a knife, then Josephine snuck up behind me…”  Cara shivered involuntarily.  “Anyway, I didn’t want any of you to know.  I was afraid it would upset you all.  Honestly, I don’t think I would want to know that a demon had used me to try to break someone.”

           “I suppose I can’t argue with that.”  Something passed across his expression like he was remembering his own demons, but it was gone before Cara thought to ask.  “Don’t keep things like that to yourself, though.  We can handle it.  Just for good measure, though, Leliana isn’t going to kill me, Josephine playing tricks like that is almost laughable, and I would never hurt you.”

           “Thank you.”  Now that she thought about it, the scene really was quite preposterous and she couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped her lips.  Cullen looked at her quizzically.  “Josephine also had a knife, spinning it in her hand like she wanted to make sure I knew she had it.”  Cullen barked a laugh.

           “That…That is an image I have difficulty imagining.”  They laughed for a moment before both of them realized the close and intimate way in which they were standing.  Cullen quickly removed his hand from her back, blushing as he stepped away.  Cara took the opportunity to sheath her dagger, which she had stopped playing with at some point, and turned her back on the Commander.  She bent to pick up her training daggers.

           “So, shall we continue?”  They happily resumed their dance of blades in silence, though Cullen eventually broke it. 

           “So why did you choose the Templars?” he asked in between swings.

           “You want to talk about this now?” Cara asked without missing a step in the fight.

           “I’m just curious.  It wasn’t the most popular idea.  I had thought you would go to the mages.”

           “Honestly?  I was never going to go to the mages. Everything that happened after I decided that just reinforced the decision.”  They swapped a few more blows before saying anything else.  Since his curiosity was written all over his face, Cara explained.  “I had never been around a mage until I was sent to the Conclave, so I’m not exactly comfortable around them.  Solas and Vivienne were difficult enough to have around; since it was up to me, I didn’t want to have the extra problems all the rebel mages would create.  There was also the issue of what would be best to use on the Breach.  I didn’t say it at the time, but I agreed with you.  Pouring more power into my mark could kill us all.  If Templars could weaken the Breach instead of increasing my mark’s power, that seemed the safer option to me.”  The entire time she had talked, they had continued to spar with each other.  After Cullen connected a strike, though, Cara stepped back.

           “I suppose that’s fair.”

           “Perhaps slightly selfish, but I still think it was the right call.  With an envy demon behind everything, it could have ruined the entire order and then where would we be when we need a Templar?”  It was her turn to attack.  “There will always be mages born, but Templars are created.  Without them, it would take time to rebuild the order, to train the necessary replacements and I didn’t think it wise to risk losing them.  Especially since it was some kind of magic that created the Breach, I figured we would need their abilities one of these days.”  Cullen blocked a dagger with his shield.

           “I must admit, I’m glad you saw things that way.  Losing the Order could have proven devastating under the circumstances.”  A few more attacks and blocks later and Cullen had won this round.  Cara fell back feeling her expression turn somber.

           “I had hoped we could get to them both, though.  Mages and Templars, that is.  Therinfal seemed the more pressing issue after Fiona found us in Val Royeaux.  To come back and find them gone was…disconcerting.”

           “It’s possible they simply refused to work with the Templars.”  Cullen attacked this time and Cara blocked a few hits before speaking.

           “Maybe, but I don’t know.  I had hoped we could get them to set aside their problems at least long enough to deal with the Breach.  If we were lucky, maybe we could end the whole thing.  I never really cared about any of it except the collateral damage they were causing.  I guess we won’t get the chance to try.”

           “You can’t save everyone.  It’s the first lesson a leader has to learn, as well as the most difficult.”  Cara ducked under the swing of his sword only to get caught by his shield, sending her back onto the snow.

           “You know, one day I’m going to see that move coming,” she grumbled as she took Cullen’s offered hand and hoisted herself to her feet. 

           “That’s why I keep using it.  You’ll get there eventually.”

           “And here I thought you just liked knocking me into the snow.”  She couldn’t help the mischievous grin she adopted.  Cullen laughed and for the first time since climbing out of her own head at Therinfal, she felt completely at ease.


	10. Closing the Breach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cara, the Templars, and her friends finally head out to close the Breach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a really long time since an update, and I apologize. I haven't had a lot of time to write fiction lately, unfortunately, but hopefully you will all enjoy this. With any luck, I'll be able to post the conclusion to this story soon. :)

            She was scared to say it.  One simple command was all it took, but she was too afraid.  Cara was also, however, out of reasonable excuses.  The Breach had remained too long, longer than it should.  But Cullen’s words rang in her ears like a bell tolling for danger.

            “We cannot know how you will be affected,” he had said, and it hung inexorably in the air.  What would happen when she closed the Breach?  It had been too powerful for her the first time; just closing the rift connected to it had nearly killed her.  The Breach was so much worse, how could she know if the Templars would be enough?  What if she couldn’t close it before it got the best of her? She suddenly realized that, while her possible death in this endeavor frightened her, she was far more scared of the other possible outcomes. 

            “Herald?”  Cullen had spoken, but they were all looking to her, waiting on her word.  For good or ill, a decision needed to be made. 

            “Tell the Templars to prepare themselves, Commander.  And tell them to get a good nights’ rest.  Tomorrow, we close the Breach.”  _I hope_.  Cullen nodded.

            “It will be done, Herald.”  Cara looked at all of them.  They appeared to be thinking the same thing she was.  Each met her gaze with forlorn determination.  _At least we’re on the same page_ , she thought.

            “Cassandra, would you gather the rest of our band, please?  Meet me…meet me in the dungeon.  I don’t want rumors flying and we won’t all fit in here.”  Cassandra nodded, then left.  “Commander, Leliana?  We’ll need people posted around the temple, just in case this goes poorly.  I don’t know what we may unleash.  Last time it was a pride demon.  If something does appear, keep them off of me and the Templars.  I’ll have Cassandra, Varric, and Solas with me, but the rest can lead squads around the area.  I’ll leave the details up to you.  It’s just a precaution, but Commander, I’d like you to oversee another group of soldiers remaining in the valley.  That way we’ll have two layers of defense.  Josephine, you may want to have warnings to various people ready in case we fail.  If I can’t close it, the Breach may be permanent and people need to prepare for whatever it may do.”  After receiving agreement, Cara left to meet her travelling companions.  It never even occurred to her that she had completely taken charge of the planning.  When she arrived in the dungeon, she found all her other companions already present, to her surprise.

            “Maker, Cassandra, did you run all over Haven?  You weren’t gone that long!”  The Seeker laughed softly.

            “Haven isn’t that big, Herald,” she replied.

            “I suppose that’s true.  Maybe next time we can just put a lantern in the tower.  Or shout.  I bet that would work.”  Everyone chuckled.  Cara suddenly felt a pang of sadness.  No matter what the outcome, tomorrow would change everything she had come to love in her time with the Inquisition.

            “Why are we in the dungeon, anyway?  Bit dank, innit?” Sera asked.

            “I know.  The advisors are meeting upstairs and I don’t think we’d all fit in there anyway.  We’re closing the Breach.  Tomorrow.”  She saw everything from determination to relief looking back at her, mirroring everything she was feeling.  “I’ll have Cassandra, Varric, and Solas with me.  The rest of you will be placed with squads around the temple in case something goes wrong.  Cullen and Leliana are working out the details of who will be where, so you’ll be informed when they have a strategy.”  She explained the rest of her plan for them and received nods of understanding from each.  “Questions?”

            “You expect something to go wrong,” Cole said.  It wasn’t quite a question.  Cara sighed and hung her head for a moment before looking at the boy.

            “I don’t know, Cole.  There are a lot of ways this could end badly and very few that end well.  I would rather plan for the bad and not need it than count on the good ending.  That’s part of why we’re down here; people aren’t overhearing this and getting concerned.”

            “That makes sense,” he replied.

            “Look, the truth is, I don’t know what’s going to happen.  I couldn’t close the Breach the first time and I pray the Templars will be enough, but I don’t know that they will be.  Unfortunately for all of us, the only way we’ll find out is to try.”  She didn’t say it, but everyone seemed to understand that this could kill her.  She thought about saying something, though she didn’t know what.  Some things are better left unsaid, however, so she just nodded and walked away trying to keep her head high.

            The rest of the day was a blur of activity.  People were running everywhere, messengers were constantly rushing to one person or another, maps were strewn across rooms, scouts were coming and going, and everywhere there was an atmosphere of dread, excitement, and hope so tangible it could almost be seen.  Well after dark, the plans for closing the Breach were firmly in place so that all that was left was to wait.  Cara tried to make sure at least some things were normal, as much as the flurry of activity would allow.  She visited all her friends when she wasn’t needed, made sure everyone got something to eat, even ran a few errands for people.  It got harder to keep her mind off the impending venture after dark, though.  She paced around her room much of the time.  Reading a book proved unhelpful, training only worked for a few minutes, and before the moon had reached its zenith, she was out of ideas to keep her mind off of it.

            Morning finally arrived.  Cara was terrified, but relieved the wait was finally over.  Being overly aware that once she left, she may not return, she gathered all of her things and put them away.  There wasn’t much outside of her usual gear, but if she didn’t come back, she didn’t want someone else to have to clean out the souvenirs she had brought back from her trips. After a cup of tea, which sufficed for breakfast, she didn’t really know what to do with herself.  Once again she was back to waiting.  She told herself to get up, to go check on the Templars, her friends, anything, but she couldn’t make herself move.  It was getting harder to keep her emotions in check.  She was terrified of what was to come, but she didn’t want to show that to all of Haven.  They looked up to her to end this, a pressure she had never felt more keenly than this moment.  It also occurred to her that even if she did succeed, and live, the Inquisition may have no real need of her any longer.  She doubted they would toss her out in the snow, but she didn’t know what capacity she would be in any longer.  Thankfully a knock on her door ended her morose reverie.

            “Come in!” she called after a steadying breath.

            “Herald,” Cullen greeted her.  “The Templars are ready.”

            “And everyone else?”

            “Just waiting for your word.”  Cara gave a breathy, forced laugh.

            “Guess it’s time, then.”  She stood and grabbed her daggers, but stopped before leaving.  “If, um…if this…If I don’t make it out of this, I’ve put all of my things into that bag on the bed so no one will have to clean up after me.  And…”  A smile suddenly came to her face, much to her surprise.  Cullen looked surprised at the smile, too.  “And I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now.”  She turned to go, but Cullen stopped her with a hand on her arm.

            “You’re coming back. You have to believe that.”

            “I want to believe it.  But we both know that may not happen.  Don’t worry about me, Cullen.  Despite everything, the past couple months have been the best time of my life.”  This time she did leave, exiting her home with Cullen trailing behind her. 

            It looked like half of Haven was outside to witness their departure. The men and women were hopeful and proud, children were trying to sneak peeks through gaps where they could.  The soldiers who were staying behind were also among the crowd.  The strange thing was that no one said a word.  Cara couldn’t help but marvel at the silence.  She and Cullen descended the stairs in front of her room to meet her companions.  The silence in Haven was so stunning, she almost hated to break it by speaking, but she had to.

            “Everyone knows their duties?”  They all nodded solemnly, none deigning to speak.  She nodded in response, though it was more to herself than anything else. 

            With a look around Haven, Cara turned to the door, confident that her friends would follow after her.  After one last pause at the gate to Haven for a calming breath, she pushed the gates open to reveal Templars, soldiers, and even more people clambering to see them off.  The Templars who had arrived early, perhaps a dozen of them, immediately dropped to one knee in front of her in salute.  Cara had never seen such a greeting for anyone, much less for herself.  It was only a few seconds she stood in front of the gates in stunned silence, but it felt like much longer.  _How do you want to be remembered_ , she thought suddenly.  _If you don’t come back, this moment is what people will remember.  Give them something great._

            “Templars!  Inquisition!” she said taking a couple steps forward.  “Too many people died when that hole was torn in our sky! Too many were killed by the rifts it opened and the demons it summoned!  Today, I say no more!”  She jutted one finger toward the Breach for emphasis.  “That _thing_ has marred our sky for too long!  Will you help me close it?”  The Templars and Inquisition soldiers started cheering, pumping their fists into the air.  Just like that, the air in the village changed from fear to excitement.  “Then let’s close this monster and be done with it!”  She and her party strode ahead of the contingent.  The Templars and soldiers fell in behind them. 

            As she started up the road toward the Temple, she found even more people lining the road and cheering them forward.  _All of Haven really is here to watch_ , she thought, though she wasn’t certain how she felt about that.  Some of the people cheered, some were praying.  The children were excited to watch the soldiers led by the Herald of Andraste and chased them down the road.  After they started across the bridge, Cara could hear people chanting “Herald!” like a rallying cry to follow.  It was probably the strangest feeling she had ever had in her life, a strange mix of fear, pride, and determination.  Considering she had the strangest followers and allies behind her, she couldn’t help but think her feelings might be justified.


	11. The Breach to Inquisitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! It's been quite a while since the last chapter, which I apologize for. I'm in the process of writing a Master's thesis as well, so fiction writing hasn't been getting much attention lately. This chapter is more like a series of small little snippets falling between closing the Breach and Cara becoming Inquisitor. I liked all these ideas, but didn't think they would be very good as stand-alone chapters, so I hope you don't mind the format. Without further ado, the last chapter of The Makings of a Herald!

            The collective breath everyone holds while Cara strides forward to close the Breach.  Cara’s silent prayer to Andraste while Cassandra and Solas say something to the Templars.  _Blessed Andraste, if you have ever looked on me with favor, please do so now.  Please let this work_ , she prays.  Cassandra in the background saying a prayer of her own to the Maker.  Solas desperately hoping Cara can fix this.  Varric waiting to spring to action, appearing nervous but confident in the Herald.  The silent begging of all who see the beam of light reach the Breach, pleading with the Maker, Andraste, and anything that will listen to let it close.

 

            After the Breach is closed, Cassandra rushing forward, ready to fight anything in her way and eager to find Cara.  Cassandra being shocked that Cara is alive, and apparently unharmed.  The cheers of Templars, Inquisition soldiers, and friends in the area when Cara stands next to Cassandra and they all realize that their Herald not only closed the Breach but lived through the ordeal.  A cheer that is heard further down the valley and reported back along the lines until it reaches Haven, Cullen, Josephine, and all the others not knowing what the cheer meant, only that it didn’t seem to stem from fighting.

 

            By the time the contingent from the Temple returns, the parties have already started.  Everyone wanting a piece of Cara, even if only a glance.  She’s a hero to everyone in Haven and Cara doesn’t know what to do with any of it.  She smiles, more than she has in a long time, she greets people, she does what she can, but she’s relieved when more attention goes toward merriment. Even her friends look at her with awe, all except for Cassandra, that is.  And Cara appreciates her friend’s pragmatic nature that won’t let her become awestruck.

 

            Haven is under attack during what should have been a celebration of victory.  Everyone is confused and the situation is going downhill with every passing second.  As if the attack wasn’t enough, a dragon appears to ruin the one bit of luck they had had with the trebuchet.  The only thing left to do is run to the Chantry.  And then the only way out is for Cara to make the ultimate sacrifice.  “What of your escape,” he says.  Cara doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even look at her friend.  They both know the answer.  Andraste had helped her close the Breach, had even let her live; Cara doubted even Andraste could grant her yet another escape from death today.  She no longer feared it, though.  At least, not like she had.  She had done her part for the Inquisition.  If her last feat would be to give all these people a chance at life?  Cara gladly takes that bargain.  She never sees her friend’s wait for an answer before it turns into an answer itself.  Never sees all the fear, concern, dread, and hope of another miracle to pass his expression within moments.

 

            _Let that thing hear you._   She doesn’t realize how much pain that would cause her.  A dragon throwing her, a madman trying to take her mark, being dangled about like a ragdoll, thrown into a trebuchet, it was all nearly too much.  But it heard her.  She got information, not that it would do the Inquisition much good if she couldn’t get it to them.  There is one last task for her, and the spark above the mountains gives her the push she needs to release the trebuchet, burying Haven, with one last snarky remark, of course.  She runs, runs away from Corypheus, away from the avalanche.  She had been calm signing her death warrant, but as she ran, she wondered why she was bothering. 

 

            It is cold.  Freezing.  She wouldn’t be able to walk much longer through this blizzard and the aftermath of the second avalanche.  _One foot in front of the other_ , she keeps thinking.  But every so often, she finds herself asking why.  Why is she still going?  Why is she still struggling?  She had done her part in Haven, or so she had thought, so why wouldn’t she let herself stop?  Of course, she always knew the answer: she wasn’t a quitter, and she certainly wouldn’t give up when her friends could be right around the next corner.

 

            Cara waking up in the camp, marveling for the third time in one day that she was still alive, thanking Andraste yet again for her benevolence.  She is confused, scared, and lost.  She feels as if all these people are depending on her, though she has no idea what to do next.  Mother Giselle starts singing a Chantry song and before Cara knows it, most of the camp is involved.  There are people bowing and kneeling before her like she’s some kind of saint.  She wants to protest, but she won’t deny them this outpouring after their ordeal.  With this outpouring, she finds determination that she won’t let them freeze in the mountains if she can help it.  She vows to get them out if it’s the last thing she does.

 

            The march to Skyhold is a long one, and Cara is leading the group far ahead.  Cassandra goes to each advisor, discussing plans for an Inquisitor.  She long ago found someone to follow in Cara, but this wasn’t her decision alone.  She also quietly asked around the ranks and each time the answer was the same: “make the Herald our Inquisitor.”  When asked if they would follow her, there was never a hesitation in their answer.  Cullen stands squarely behind Cara, Josephine is hesitant, but supportive.  Leliana fears it, but after seeing where Cara led them, finally agrees wholeheartedly. 

 

            Skyhold is a wonder to behold, but its glory is soon overshadowed by events.  Cara finds herself on the stairs, in front of everyone, with Leliana offering her a sword and Cassandra offering her the Inquisition.  Cara is stunned and doesn’t know what to say.  But she knows Corypheus won’t stop and that someone has to stop him.  _Andraste be with me a little longer_ , she prays as she picks up the sword.  A few words from Cassandra and Cullen and the entire crowd are cheering for Cara.  _What do I do?_ She thinks over and over.  Then she raises her sword like Cullen had done.  That does the trick.  Apparently Cara’s place really is with the Inquisition, for much longer than she had dared hope.  She finds that she did have what it took to be a Herald to the faithful; now she prays she also has the makings of an Inquisitor worthy of the title.


End file.
